TwOURlight A Story About A Cloud
by EdwardsYoungIrishLady
Summary: I suck at summaries but this story is a funny one! Written by Emer and Sive there is a full summary inside :
1. Note From The Authoress

Hello everyone!!!

If you guys are reading this I'm going to presume you have stumbled across our TwOURlight fanfic!!! This story is co-written by Emer and Sive and told from the points of view of Alice and Emer (leader of the Irish coven the newest edition to Forks!) I am going to tell you to **stop** now if you love cannon couples and cannon behaviour, have a strange obsession with Bella Swan or have absolutely no sense of humour!!! I promise you if you give it a chance this story is really really funny and is guaranteed to make you laugh if you are a total "randomer" like Sive and I!!! Anyway I am going to just give you a quick introduction to the Irish Coven before you begin!!!

Emer: The leader of the pack. Short with short blond hair, always wearing designer clothes. She can disappear from one place and appear in another. She has a bubbly personality and is completely amazed by Edward and dazzled by his bronze hair. She has a charming Dublin accent and is never seen without eyeliner.

Courtney: Our "innocent" catholic school girl/ Mary Jane. She is average height and has the most beautiful long blond hair you will ever see. She can control the air and thinks she can "fly"... She can't!!! Upon arrival in Forks she takes an immediate shine to Emmett.

Aoife and Paula: Tall with long brown wavy hair. They have quite drab personalities and are nowhere near as enthusiastic as Emer or Courtney! Aoife has the power to change peoples minds while Paula can control the earth (she's quite unique!).They are wolf girls at heart and refuse to admit they are vampires. AoifeXJacob PaulaXEmbry.

Roisin: As agro and scary as Roisin is, she truly is a loveable rogue! She is quite angry and thus has her firepower. She is one of the newer members of the coven but she always seems to have something to say. After stumbling into a train wreck marriage to Eoghan Quigg she quickly finds the love of her life.

Jenny: The man-izer of the group. She has beautiful fiery red hair that flows down her back. She can read minds like Edward, and has a real love for everything Irish. She is nearly as enthusiastic as Emer and Courtney but they just take the cake!

This is a story that takes place after Breaking Dawn and is about a coven of Irish vampires who move to Forks and are intent on sinking their claws into the Cullen men!!! It is about the mischief and mayhem they get up to in Forks! This story was written by our group of friends so please refrain from insulting our fantasies!!!

I am going to leave you to read away now!!! I really hope you like our story!!! Feel free to review it… no swearing please- that goes for you Doireann you're the reason I had to delete this story and disappoint all my subscribers!!!


	2. New Kids On The Block

**Tw****our****light- A Story about a cloud**

_**Disclaimer: We do not own twilight the marvelous Stephenie Meyer does.**_

**_Enjoy!!!_**

Alice POV

I

I lay on my bed and buried my head in my arms. Another day at the Cullen house, Another day of school and night of scrabble.

Since Bella had arrived that's all we did! We had fallen into a vicious routine of word games and board games.

I sighed a mournful sigh. Life was just so predictable and I was sick of it. I wanted fun, excitement and craziness!Suddenly my sight left me and a vision threw itself into my eyes like an oncoming train.

"_Alice we're going to start scrabble without you if you don't come down,"_

_Edward called up to me from downstairs..._

I was back to reality. I didn't understand why my visions were so fecking pointless sometimes. I got up and hurried down the stairs before he could shout at me.

II

"My word is...Spoon!" Bella lay down her letters on the board. She had SUCH a whiny voice! _Shut up, shut up, SHUT UP!! _I couldn't believe I used to be friends with her. She was so annoying to everyone!She nagged Edward about throwing his turtle neck jumpers on the floor. She always started every sentence with _'well I think..." _and she was stupid like you wouldn't believe.

"Bella, honey...Spoon is spelled with two 'O's." Edward quietly tried to explain.

" No it's not! What do you think Rosalie?" She tilted her head to the side and looked at Rose. Rose was looking at her red nails with squinted eyes and hadn't listened to Bella. Bella lent down, took off her shoe and flung it at her head. There was a loud thud as it made contact with Rose's head which made her fall backwards into the floor.

"Rose?"Emmett looked concerned. Rosalie wasn't moving. I put my hand over my face to try and stop the aching in my head. I thought I was having a headache, which would have been cool because I had never had one before, but it was just a vision.

_We were in the Cafeteria. It was lunchtime, tomorrow._

_I had been staring at my apple when my eyes flew to the door. In walked six girls in a triangle formation. I looked at them curiously. The girl at the top of the triangle was looking around the seats for someone._

_She had short hair which was blonde and curled up below her ears. _

_She wore thick black eyeliner and her clothes were all designer by the look of it. I loved her style and wanted to be her friend so I could borrow her clothes. _

_Before I could get up to introduce myself she looked over in my direction and smiled. She started to make her way over to our table. _

_By now the rest of the Cullens had looked up to see what was happening. _

_Edward looked the blonde girl up and down as she walked over and looked more then slightly turned on._

I re-entered reality.

I burst out laughing when I saw Edwards face. He had seen my vision and had gone bright red.

_Its all right Eddie, I won't tell Bella, _I thought.

It was going to be a fun day at school tomorrow.

**Emer POV**

"Tell me again why we came to this kip?" Roisin was being as subtle as a sledge hammer at the minute, but something told me that there was something here for me, something for all of us. This was meant to be for us. We bought some land on the border between the rez (the hip homies around forks seemed to call it that) and the forest. We all love animals in more way than one if you catch my drift, we're kinda one of a kind vampirettes with one of a kind talents and of course on of a kind hair styles. When we arrived in Forks we had 12 hours to fully construct a house but as you can imagine with strong willed young women like ourselves it only took us 10 and we only spent a grand on the refurb (big whoop), our Jenny has a way with men. She's tall and completely gorgeous like the rest of us with firey red hair and a firey personality to go with it. I suppose you could call her a Manizer, We settled down for a few drinks and a bit of banter when all the work was done and all the wardrobes were filled.

"Jaysus lads the weather here is worse than home" I said in my charming Dublin accent that everyone loves so much.

"Well I think we may be able to put up with it, come look at this!" said our lovely tech girl Paula, we call her Garcia though.

"Oh my God topless boys! Said my lovely Aoife with glowing eyes.

"Shall we go introduce ourselves ladies?" I said knowing this would make their night, we needed time out anyway.

These were different boys tall, dark and well... some of the coven found them handsome.

"You ladies wanna party?" some total weirdo shouted over... It was quite scary I must say. But we went along, we were new here and we all knew we needed friends.

It was surprisingly fun there was a bonfire and we got to dance around it singing Single Ladies... we all did but Roisin. But the guys were disturbingly happy watching us... I wish they'd not been though because some guy called Quil was all over me. I wanted him to go away.

Apparently theres more like us here, our age and even though taken according to Leah the Leech Lover totally gorgeous! When we got home after Aoife and Paula got rather close to a guy named Jacob and a guy named Embry, we did our research on the Cullens and Garcia got us into classes with the Cullen guys. We had drama with them after lunch and we were going to make an entrance. Bring it on.

IV

We dragged through the start of the school day with a new record of 190 phone numbers between the six of us... I think it was something to do with the fact none of us had pockets so we stored numbers... close to our hearts. The guys did seem to enjoy our presence in school that day, the conversations we heard were entertaining to say the least. We walked into the lunch hall knowing exactly what we were doing, we were immediately met by three hundred pairs of eyes. But there was one pair of eyes I was looking for, and I found them almost straight away, Alice Cullens.

"Lets go girls" This was where it all began. We strolled to the table at stupid human pace ugh stress and introduced ourselves to the whole clan. The first person I saw was the bronze haired boy who introduced himself as Edward. I decided to sit beside Alice who totally fit in with our six. She had the most amazing clothes and fab hair (very important!) we decided to let her have Jasper he was hot, But she was one of us. Bella was a moany little brat I wanted to shove her out of a helicopter over a cliff onto jagged razors that would be fun. That would happen

.

"Well me and my husband we have a baby. And the baby is called Renesmee and Renesmee is half human half vampire and..."

SHUT THE FUCK UP! I DON'T WANT TO KNOW ABOUT YOUR SEX LIFE, I thought to myself and I could see Edward felt the same. We were quiet for lunch, we didn't do much we would make our first impression in drama.

It was performance day in drama and we just so happened to have something prepared, our rendition of the Cell Block Tango. We certainly did make an impression on those Cullen boys and every other boy in the class on that note. They should wear proper fitting trousers in future but at least we knew we were doing something right. Afterwards I decided to chat to Edward. Courtney went straight to Emmett and practically sat on his lap... she's very forward like that. But I knew I had to play the game, and so I did.

V

**  
Alice POV**

Our new friends.

The Irish clan that had introduced themselves earlier. I really liked them and we had hit it off straight away.

(*Flashback)

"_Hi I'm Emer." She had a great Dublinish accent. Her clan was crowded around the table. I smiled at them in welcome._

_I looked over at my family. Edward was stammering like a idiot like usual. Edward glared at me but I looked at Bella instead to avoid him. Bella was looking off into space, her mind distracted by a rogue piece of dust that was near her noise. Emmett was looking at one of Emer's friends. She had blonde, flowing hair and was the cutest Marie-Jane I'd ever seen. He had a big smile on his face that was very scary. I stifled a laugh. He had a crush, no? _I thought.

_Edward silently nodded. Rose still hadn't moved since the shoe incident yesterday, I think she was paralyzed but nobody cared enough to listen to my theory. I looked at Jasper and then followed his gaze. He was again looking at my boobs in my low cut baby pink jumper. I threw my eyes to heaven. _

_I looked back at Emer who had become preoccupied in staring at Edwards hair in wonder. I sighed with content. At least it wasn't boring. _

(*End Flash Back)

We ended the Tango and made our way to the locker rooms. I was talking to Paula on the way there. It was interesting to say the least.

"...and then he was all little and he was like _Oww Noo, someone dropped my cards in the water _and then big Yu-Gi-Oh came was was like Fahh.....I'll save you..."

I laughed a mad laugh as I looked into her green crazy eyes. She was so fun and full of life.

All of a sudden a vision came to me and I staggered backwards.

_Bella was in a forest. She turned around and a scream was heard through the trees._

I came back to myself and sat down in the hall from dizziness. Wow! That was heavy. I felt a bit shaken as I stood up. Paula helped me, she looked worried. I smiled to reassure her . Nothing to worry about just yet.

VI

I was back at the house on the living room couch. I was still a bit shaken from earlier. Suddenly there was a knock at the door. I got up slowly and walked at a human pace tying not to fall over.

I opened the door and was shocked to find Emer standing in the doorway, bag in hand.

She swept past me onto the room and turned around. She had a big, crazy smile on and I started to get worried.

"SLEEPOVER!" she yelled and the rest of the Irish clan filed into the room carrying a variety of backpacks and makeup bags. Paula was holding an inflatable raft and I wondered silently why she would need that.

"Nobody knows, she's crazy," Jen answered my unspoken question. I was silent with shock as I wondered did anyone else have a special gift in their clan?

"Yep, they sure do," Jen replied to my thought again with a wink. "Okay guys, Alice wants to see your gifts."

Courtney stepped forward and smiled smugly. She raised her arm like superman and put her hand on her jutted hip.

"I can flyyyyyyyy...." Courtney squealed as she tried desperately to lift off. Aoife grabbed her backpack and wrenched her backwards so that she fell. She stepped over the Courtney shaped blob on the floor and held out her hand.

"Hi Alice. Look what I can do!"

**Emer POV**

"Would you like some food?"

"Not thanks I'm not hungry"

"Are you sure?" Aoife looked at Alice with a strange twisted expression, it always made me laugh when she did that.

"Chicken nuggets would be good!" Alice explained.  
"With or without the wrap?" I added slyly I don't like being left out of conversations!

"I don't eat food..."

"Exactly" Aoife replied proudly "that's my gift!"

"Thats super cool, you can make people change their mind! So anyone else...?" Alice added enthusiastically.

"Roisin is our fire girl... so to speak" I commented politely "and Paula's our earth girl... We have control of nearly everything between the six of us!"

"What about you Emer what makes you special" Alice asked.

"Apart from being dashingly attractive, which your brother said according to Jenny... I can do this"

(*POOF!)

"Eh where'd Emer go?"

I decided to go check on my "secret" admirer. I have a really short attention span so I thought it could help me pass the time...

(*POOF) I reappeared in the room.

"EEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWW I didn't need to see that!"

"Why what happened?!" Paula said eagerly.

"They were... on the floor..."

"Oh well maybe I should stop teasing the poor guy" Emmett added.

Wait a minute where did Emmett come from?

"They were talking about the recession! I've never seen such a sad sight in all my life..."

Emmett's laugh boomed around the room... and then he legged it up the stairs to his room.  
"Well Courtney, so much for your window of opportunity I said sarcastically but I could see Courtney was planning something.

At that moment there was a loud cry from the forest. "They want us out there guys" Jenny said silently "it's the guys from last night!"

There was a cry in unison "BYE!"

Paula and Aoife dashed out of the room with Jenny and Roisin hot on their heels.

"I hope you don't mind we'd rather stay here" Courtney said on both our behalves.

"No problemo home skillies" Alice replied enthusiastically.

We were just after sitting down when Edward and Bella came in the door.

"We heard visitors! Who's here?" Edward said hopefully.

"Sup ma homeslice?" I replied casually.

"Oh its you guys!" Edwards face light up,

"Nothing but!" I said but in a flash Courtney vanished... up the stairs... after Emmett...

"OH MY GOD IS THIS A SLEEPOVER? I LOVE SLEEPOVERS AND SO DOES REN..." Bella started.  
"No this is not a sleepover" I said quickly

But your welcome to stay if you want to. I thought to myself and winked at Edward. At least wifey didn't see I didn't see that I don't need her moany ass all up in my grill.

Eventually she left and Edward said he had to talk to Alice and he would follow her home.

VIII

**Alice POV**

The sleepover had gone great. We had played spin the bottle and somehow Courtney managed to land on Emmett every time. It was amazing! Suddenly I had a vision that Edward would land on me next turn. I shuddered and quickly swapped seats with Emer. She looked at me questioningly. Edward spun the bottle and it landed on her. She smiled cheekily at me. I returned the smile. All of a sudden Edwards phone rang and it was the Molester.

"Hey Edward, I'm doing this jigsaw puzzle and its sooooo hard!"

"What is it supposed to be?" Edward replied bleakly, obviously upset by the interruption.

"Well according to the box it's meant to be a rooster"

"Bella love, we've been through this. You'll never be able to make a rooster out of those jigsaw pieces."

"Well why not!"  
"Honey just put the cornflakes back in the box... I'll explain later."

"Okay, I love you"  
"Yeah, bye"

"Leave it to Edward to marry a total nut job Emmett said and his laugh boomed around the room.

I got really hungry and decided it was time for me to get some food.

"Now where were we?" Edward glanced over longingly at Emer.

"I'll be back later, I'm going to eat," I called.

Emer replied in a dreamy mumble. "Mmmmm...."

I flung open the door and dashed out into the night. I heard someone following me, I turned my head and found Bella hot on my tail.

Suddenly I stopped, Bella sped forward and stopped when she realised I had stopped. I glared at her.

"What are you doing Bella?" I asked grumpily. I didn't want to talk to her, I hated hunting with her she always wanted to talk about sex with my brother. It was disgusting.

"_Well I think _it's time for me to go eat. Plus I need to talk to you." She pouted and slumped her shoulders.

Ughh! Even if I said No she would follow me and shout to me from across the forest. Plus I could lead her into the middle of the forest and lose her. _Haha, That would be so funny_, I thought.

So I let her come with me. She talked none stop about naked Edward and I tried to tune her whiny voice out. I had been walking in a zigzag pattern for about 10 minutes now so we were far enough away from the house.

"Hey, Bella...."

".....And then he bit the pillow cause I'm so good in bed.....Yeah, what?"

" I think there's some deer over there, can you have a look."

Bella started walking in the direction I had pointed. When she was far enough away not to hear me I turned and ran towards home.

IX

When I got back to the front door I couldn't help the hysterical laughter escape me that I had been trying to hold in. The front door open and Edward, Emer and Emmett stared at me with confused looks. I was laughing to much to talk so I ran threw the events in my head for Eddie to explain.

Edward cracked a small smile which quickly was replaced by his serious face. He was such a wet blanket some times. He scowled at me and then turned to Emer and Emmett.

" She left Bella in the forest." He stated.

Emer burst out laughing. "Nice one, home dog!" She high-fived me. Emmett's booming laugh echoed off the night.

Suddenly I got a vision. I stopped laughing instantly.

_Bella was in the forest. The same place I'd left her._

"_Alice? ALICE? She called. "I couldn't find anything."_

_She looked confused. Shadows started appearing in the light on the moon. Bella say the shadows and looked curiously at them._

"_Hello? Alice, Is that you?"_

_She walked towards it. The nearest shadow began to grow and she backed away. A small man in green emerged from the trees. She was stunned and then she started laughing._

"_Aww! Aren't you just the cutest wittle thing ever!"_

_The small man looked annoyed. _

"_Get her Lads!" he shouted in a Northern Ireland accent. Bella screamed and tried to run. Seven of the men jumped on her and tied her up with rope. When her did that they lifted her with surprising strength. The first one put a gag in her mouth. She tried to scream. "Ugfhhh..."_

"_Eigh, Lassie you ain't be going nowhere."_

_He laughed a hearty laugh and they all dissapeared into the trees._

I re-entered reality and found myself lying on the ground with Jasper's arms around me. He had been in our room and heard the others screams when the vision had took over. He had a terrified look in his eyes. Obviously I had had a bad reaction to that vision. I kissed him and smiled weakly.

"Don't worry love. I'm fine now." He let me go looking anxious. I looked at the others. Edward looked sick.

"How long do we have?" He asked hurriedly.

"I.." There was a scream heard from the forest, there was no mistaking it was Bella.

"It's to late now," I sighed. Everyone looked shocked except Emmett who had no idea what was going on.

"Bella been taken by something!" I explained. His eyes bulged, he was lost for words.

"By what?" Emer inquired.

"I'm not sure. They were little men, about seven of them. They were wearing a little green suit and they talked with an Irish accent."

Emer erupted into laughter.

"You're kinding me, right!" I looked at her puzzled.

She stopped her laughing and her forehead crinkled.

"Oww....You're serious......Well from what you described, I have no doubt they're Leprechauns!"

"Wow! That's not what I expected!" I smiled at how ridiculous it sounded. _It's too late for Bella. I'm sorry Edward, it's my fault_, I thought.

"It's okay, I don't blame you," He hugged me tightly. I grabbed Jaspers hand and we all walked back towards the house slowly.

Suddenly Courtney poked her head out of the front door. She looked at us curiously.

"Where have you been?" I asked. Courtney's cheeks went red and Edward erupted laughing.

"What?" I asked impatiently.

"She was in Emmett's underwear drawer.

"EWWWWWW!" Me and Emer said together. And I thought I was obsessed!


	3. Living On The Edge

**Chapter 2: Living On The Edge**

**May I clarify I never watched that show!!!  
**

**I think it's a cool name though...**

**Hope you like it!!!**

EMER POV

After a productive night in the Cullen house **wink wink nudge nudge** myself and Courtney came back to the house to find Roisin and Jenny sitting around doing Sudoku puzzles. Obviously they weren't that into wolves... but I suppose they stink when they get wet don't they? I thought to myself.

"Exactly" Jenny replied quickly... I forgot she could read minds

"Yep thats what I do..."

"We have to tell you something" I said in a stern tone of voice.

We told them the story of Alice and Bella's hunting trip and how Bella had been abducted by small men with northern Irish accents.

"Oh no not Gerry Adams again!" Jenny moaned.

"Not it's not Gerry but if there's leprechauns that means..." Roisin was cut off mid sentence.

*ding dong*

I strolled towards the door hoping it would be Aoife and Paula, but of course not...!!!

"Oh it's you..." I said with a hint of hatred in my voice.

"Where is she? How dare you keep me from her?! You know how I feel about her! I need to see her!"

"Steady there Eoghan! We don't want you to wet yourself or anything..." I said coolly.

"Where is she?!" he replied urgently.

"I'll get her for you." I turned around swiftly "Roisin your bitch is here!"

Eoghan was Roisin's on/off boyfriend for the last decade or so... he is really good looking but I don't know whether there are really feelings between them. But I suppose if he followed her all the way to Washington there must be something there.

"You never go anywhere without your army do you Eoghan?" Roisin asked politely.

"No, I came to see you. I got you a gift. And this..."

He got down on one knee and said...

"Roisin I love you as much as the stars above."

"Well where else are there stars?" I asked.

"Well he does think the sun shines out of his back side so maybe..." Jenny answered but was rudely interrupted.

"Would you two shut up!" he shouted " Roisin I love you, will you please do me the honor of becoming my wife."

"What's my gift?!" Roisin replied with a huge grin on her face.

"This" he clapped his hands and his army of leprechauns produced Bella "you may do with her as you wish as long as you agree to marry me. Will you Roisin?"

"Oh I will, I will, I will!"

Talk about cheesey fan fiction stuff!

"Can I have your present?" I asked nicely.

"Sure" she replied.

She was off in La La Land, her and Eoghan both. This was the last thing we needed!

I called my new BFFL Alice to tell her the good news. We would take the Cullen's private helicopter and Eoghan would fly it to over the cliffs in La Push. This was going to be fun. Alice decided he should throw her into the water and wait for her to drown. After we made plans myself and Alice and the rest of the girls that were around went to our house for "lunch", we invited the Cullen's and Carlisle, Esme, Emmett, Jasper and of course Edward all came to chat. It seemed no one cared about Bella's disappearance but we still had to be safe. We couldn't be blamed for her death if anything was to happen. *evil chuckle*

I wondered what would happen. Was the bonfire party still going on? And where was Rosalie? I haven't seen her since the first day of school! And the final question I had to ask myself was, where was Aoife and Paula?

**Alice POV**

**XI**

It was Saturday morning, I sat in the front garden; cross legged, staring at the evil rock in front of me.

I was practicing the art of levitation but it hadn't really been working so far. I really wanted to expand my powers but I just didn't know how to. I got up and circled it twice giving it one last shot, I was concentrating really hard but it was no use. I picked it up and drop kicked it into the forest. I suddenly had a quick vision that it would land on Jaspers head and he would fall over. I was terrified that he would be paralyzed like Rosalie, who was just lying in the basement now and I raced off towards the forest. The trees weaved past me at high speeds but I had no time to enjoy it I had to get to Jasper. I saw him up ahead and sped up, determined to beat the rock. I collided with him mid-stride, he cried out in surprise and we both flew forward and rocketed down the hill. We tumbled down the rocky hill and I hung on to his chest tightly, not wanting to be flung off into a tree. The rolling stopped as the hill gave way.

Jasper jumped up into a defensive crouch but when he saw it was me he relaxed.

"Jesus Alice! What the hell where you doing?" He gestured madly with his hands when he said that.

I bit my lip and looked down.

"....he..ock.......oing..to...it....ou" I mumbled.

"WHAT????"

"Okay.....The rock was going to hit you," I would have blushed if I could.

"Again..WHAT?"

"Okay so I was trying to levitate this rock and then I couldn't do it so I got really annoyed and I kicked it into the trees and then I saw in a vision that it was going to hit you in the head and I didn't want to be paralyzed li...."

Jasper captured my mouth with a kiss. Making me stop my gerbil rambling.

"Breath Honey," He smiled sweetly at me.

He held out his hand and pulled me off the ground. We walked back, linked arms up the hill.

"So Jaz, what were you doing out here in the first place?" I asked politely, trying to hide my curious tone.

"Well, It was meant to be a surprize but since you saved me from the killer rock.....Okay..........I want to get you a pet for our anniversary next week!" He waved his arms like a show girl presenting a new car.

I jumped up and down and squealed. I'd always wanted a pet but everybody had said I wasn't mature enough.

I threw my arms around his neck and kissed him.

"You rock my world you sexy beast! What kind of pet is it? Will I like it? Is it a poodle! I hate poodles, there fur sheds in clumps you know!"

"No it's not a poodle, come on I'll show you."

He grabbed my hand and dragged me off back in the direction we had come, deeper into the forest.

XII

I screamed with excitement when he showed me. It was the most amazing animal I had ever seen and it was just what I had wanted. It was a Siberian tiger. She (I was told) had a beautiful white coat with dagger sharp strips. She was proud and dangerous. I stared into her big yellow eyes and I saw something that was more human then animal. Suddenly her eyes started to change colour. They were turning green, I stood back in complete shock. Her fur started to fall off and she stood off her front legs and balanced on her back legs. Her muscular body slimed until it looked very like a humans. Me and Jasper stared in awe as the girl took shape in front of us. I looked at what used to be my pet and she stared back with a bored expression.

"Oww, it's you guys." The tiger girl said.

"What? I don't think we've had the pleasure of meeting before." Jasper said with his polite Southern accent.

"Well believe me I've heard about YOUR family before. They never shut up about it!" She waved her hands and glared at me angrily. I held Jasper tightly.

" Why don't you come up to the house and we all can talk." he explained.

"Kay," She shrugged.

"By the way, what's your name?" I asked curiously.

"Emma," she smiled. I thought that was a cool name, well not technically cool but temperate. Haha Geography was finally sticking in my head!

We walked up the hill again I held Jasper around the waist. He held me by my shoulders. Emma fidgeted with the belt on her jeans, which had appeared with clothes when she turned into a human.

I jumped away from Jasper and flew up the hill. He followed me quickly, thinking I had sensed danger.

"Wha, What's wrong????" He looked left and right, confused.

"The rock is back!!! I'm going to kill it. I leapt on the rock and tackled in away from Jasper. That rock wasn't going to beat me! HAHA

Emer POV

We called over for Alice early that morning to she if she wanted to go on a random shopping trip to Dundrum with us, but when we got there there was a little surprise waiting for us. When we walked in the door I was immediately overjoyed, that small person on the couch, could it be?!  
"Emzy Wemzy!" I said slightly over enthusiastically.  
"Oh its you" she replied dimly.  
"I've missed you so much?! Where did you go?"  
"Is Roisin here?"  
"Not yet why?"  
"I was with Rob Carney. Things are going well back in Dublin but he misses you and Jenny. And a few of the others. But he's terrified of Roisin. Apparently last time she got a little bit carried away when she was around him."  
"Oh she's with Eoghan now... I think your safe!"  
"YAY!"  
"How are Claire and Luke?"  
"It's all good, you know yourself. What about you guys how's Spoons?"  
"Forks"  
"What evs!"  
"Well all is good here! We have a new best friend who I see you've already met, Alice. Roisin married Eoghan, Paula and Aoife disappeared off with the wolves and we haven't seen them since. Courtney is off stalking Emmett and well lets just say I'm making progress on my bronze haired boy!"  
"Oh you've found him... yay" Emma said dully.  
"Will you be staying here? I missed you so much, you truly are the melted cheese on my white bread."  
"Well depending on how Roisin feels we're planning to stay here for a while?"  
"COOLNESS! Well I think Courtney's moving out soon so that should leave an empty room."  
"I'll call Rob."

XII

We spent the rest of the evening in our house. The Cullens came over and we all sat on the various Buddha bags laid out around the room. I was let do the interior design and I went a little OTT with the whole fung shuai thing.... Emma gave the Cullens a grim reception but I could tell deep down she really liked them. Rob arrived looking hot as ever, big rugby guys was always a thing with our cloud but it was Emma and Claire that really stuck to their guns.

Edward was so over the whole Bella thing by now and Jenny was watching his thoughts just to make sure that he and Emmett were ok with the Bella and Rosalie before me OR COURTNEY did anything.

We played Abba singstar and of course I won. Our rendition of Mamma Mia in Irish was a huge hit. The night was a lot of fun, we were talking to Alice afterwards and she said she had a vision that there was someone coming to visit Carlisle. Alice and I went back to the house to bring the visitor over to our place. While we were on the way back we were talking about different memorable parts of our lives. I told her about the summer me, Jen and Roisin spent in Vegas, when myself and Jenny accidentally woke up married and Roisin woke up with "I told you so." tattooed across her stomach.

She told me about the summer she spent with Jasper before we came to Forks. How they had gone back to Tennessee and Jasper soon realized he couldn't have the best of both worlds. He couldn't be a human killer and be with Alice at the same time. He had to work things out. She had to admit he had nerve but at the same time he wanted it all. They went horseback riding and to the odd rodeo but according Alice Jasper didn't have his head in the game until the boys came back. Then he asked her the faithful question "Can I have this dance?" and they've been in this together since that.

When we got back to the house there was only five minutes until the mystery guest arrived.  
**Alice POV**  
Me and my besty, Emmey were in the car swapping stories. I told her about Jasper and she told me about Vegas. Roisin was a funny fellow. I wondered if she still had the tattoo. In no time at all we arrived at the house. I kind of knew who the visitor was but I wasn't really sure my visons didn't work around werewolfs, gays and plumbers.  
We slowed to a halt and I hopped out of the car excited. I knew this was going to be an adventure.

"Come on Creamy, Lets meet the mystery man," I squealed.

I opened the door, inside Carlisle sat on the coach with a man. He had a long, angular face. He wore a long, black trench coat. He was holding a screwdriver so I presumed he was a plumber.  
"Hello Mr. Plumber, Im Alice." I held out my hand to shake. He got off the coach and waggled his hip over to were I stood and shook my hand.

"Well Hello, Sweetness, Yous is FABoulous!" He had a slight Brazilian accent, and I knew he wasn't just a plumber.  
"So whats your name?" Emer asked from the corner.  
"Tis David, David Tenent! Darling."

Emer POV

"David Tenent? Cool name. Where are you from?" I replied.

"The greatest nation in the world The United Kingdom."

*** Cricket noise ***

"Well, we are currently having a small get together in the Irish vampires house on the border, would you like to join us my friend?" Carlisle suggested

He had a voice that envied Patrick Dempsys (talk about sexy!) when he negociated. I could get used to living in this house.

"Of course I would love to join you, these Irish vampires sound like jolly good fun I must say my dear Carlisle." David replied.

It was then I decided I would address him as Dave from now on.

"Well Dave," I said with a smug grin on my face. "Try to keep up!"

Myself and Alice dashed through the door with Carlisle and Dave close behind us.

**Alice POV  
**When we got back to the Irish coven house the ground was shaking from the bass of the song that was playing. It was Black Eyed Peas "Pump It" and they had taken the name literally. Everytime the song said _pump it_ they hired up the volume a bit.  
I wasn't sure how many people there were but they were spilling out onto the front yard.  
I walked into the house looking for Jasper. I turned the corner into the living room and I shook my head as I watched my so called husband make a fool of himself.  
He was standing on the dining table in his underwear, I didn't know were he had got a pirate hat but he was wearing it on his head.  
He was dancing out of time to the music and he had a bottle of vodka in his hand. I guess I had sloved the mystery of the dancing moron!  
I pushed through the crowded room and attempted to pull Jasper off the table.

Emer POV

We got back to the house and Alice quickly grabbed Jasper and dragged him away from the table. But wait, "come back with my vodka bitch!" I screamed across the room. Dave was quickly behind me but I could feel someone else very near to me.

"Hey Davey, can I call you that? Come with me." It was Jenny, before I could say anything Jenny was all over Dave on the dance floor that I had installed doing her non PG style of dance.

Then I glanced across the room and saw Courtney draped over some random guy and lets just say... GET A ROOM!!! I quickly ran over and redirected her in Emmett's direction. Thank God everyone was so drunk, I couldn't bear for anyone to remember what they were doing tonight. Hey look its Edward

**  
Alice POV  
**Once I had got Jasper locked in the bedroom asleep and I had given Emer back the vodka I went about exploring the rest of the house.  
In the kitchen there were alot of Irish men, probably from Ireland. In the living room there were seven little leprechauns trying to caup a feel on my neighbour Snow White. In the dining room there was Paula and Aoife playing cards on an inflatable raft with a pack of semi-naked men!  
I walked into the bathroom where Emer was having a good time with Edward. I averted my eyes to the sight.  
" Guys...cough,cough...mmm....GUYS!" I shouted at them when they continued on kissing.  
"Look over there it's Ryan Tuberty!" Emer jumped of Edwards lap and looked around franticly.  
I stared at her blankly. O_o"  
"Aoife and Paula are back, they're in the dining room. Come on lets go talk to them!"  
Emer threw up her arms in excitement and we scurried out of the room together to go talk to the ones that weren't here for ages!

Emer POV

I don't know what happened to Edward after we left the bathroom, and I don't know what Bella did to the poor guy. When we got outside the music was down Jenny and Dave were no where to be seen (let the records show that David Tenant never was or will be gay and his feelings towards Carlisle are only those of friendship.) all of our old vampire friends were... gone and it was like nothing had ever happened. It was quiet Aoife and Paula were playing the whole... oh my God help me I can't play pool act, at the pool table. Trying to hustle the wolf boys I'm guessing into doing something unimaginable knowing those two! When we went over they had cleared off. The girls had obviously won and were leading two of the guys up the stairs to the oxygen bar while the others left still shocked by the girls insane skills.

When we got to the pool table we caught a glimpse of Courtney and Emmett and lets just say... GET A HOUSE! All of a sudden there was a gasp behind me.

"Jasper" Alice said quickly and vanished off up the stairs.

Then all of a sudden Edward was beside me, he reached for my hand, the thoughts i win crossed my mind as we crossed the room to Courtney and Emmett.

"Get a house!" Edward screamed.

"Get a life Bro" Emmett said back. "Stop throwing your lovey dovey relationship in my face."  
"Hey guy's give it up." Alice said from behind me, with a fully dressed Jasper in tow.

"Well there is one way we can settle this." I said smugly.

"Oh look we have a pool table!" Courtney said happily.

"No shit Sherlock." Alice added.

"Winner gets to have their relationship plastered on the walls if they want it to be." Emmett said.

"Loser has to suck it up and live with it" Edward replied.

"REFEREE!" Alice and Jasper screamed together.

"Bring it on." Emmett said smugly.

I knew he was to big headed to not show off in front of Courtney. This would be a close game, I did spend a fair amount of time hustling (I though Paula and Aoife everything they know) but i was never put up against vampires.


	4. Relationships

**TwOURlight Chapter 3**

**Relationships**

**The next instalment to our tale!  
The distance we go to save the people we love.**

**Hope you guys enjoy it!**

**Alice POV**

I jumped up and down and squealed. This match was going to be really exciting. Naturally I already knew who won but I tried not to think about and let Edward know, that would have spoiled the fun. They all grabbed a pool Que and surrounded the table. Emmett looked at Edward with a cocky smile. Courtney was staring at Emmett with big doe eyes. Emer was dancing around with her Que and singing _Don't you wish your Girlfriend. _Edward again had his mind boggled by her sexy hips. I screamed at him in my head to wake him from his trance.

WAKE UP EDDIE! GET YOUR FREAKIN' HEAD IN THE GAME.

"Alright, alright stop yelling," He answered back grumpily.

I smiled at the audience and bowed like a ring leader in a circus.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, Witness something you've never seen before. The first Cullen Pool-off to determine flashing in public." I yelled in my most manly voice.

"Mmm, Honey that's not why they're doing this," Jasper started to say.

"Oww, whatevs!"

I shrugged and turned back to the pool table. Emmett and Edward were locked in a very fierce thumb war. I could see this was going to take a lot of organizing to stop them from getting distracted. Never bet against Alice Cullen you would almost certainly lose.

XVII

Three roles of celotape, one cup of coffee and a top hat later everyone had there eyes on the pool table. I had constructed a celotape wall between Eddie and Em. I was wearing a top hat and a very small waist coat. I internally considered becoming a ring leader with my lion Emma as a side kick.

I twirled around and sang, "Let the games begin!"

Emer POV

Hey Edward do you play pool?  
"I do indeed!"  
Great you and me both but lets have a little fun before we run away with this game.  
"No problemo sweetie."  
Hook line and sinker I laughed in my head. This was going to be fun.

Emmett was up first.  
"It's all geometry, ladies…. Watch."  
Emmett strutted around the table, trying to decide which shot to take. He got fancy, trying to impress Courtney, and missed his shot by a hair. Then Edward got up to the table and missed his shot by a millimeter just to make our act look good. Courtney was up next she sunk the 2 ball but missed her next shot. I made an absolute spectacle of myself trying to use the wrong end of the cue, or stick as I called it.

Emmett got cocky thinking he had this in the bag, when myself and Edward decided it was time to bring our A game to the table.

**Alice POV  
**I watched the game eagerly from my seat. They all took their shots with Courtney being the only one to sink two balls. (Hehe)  
Emer stared at her cue like she didn't know which way to put it, but I knew she had a game plan.  
Emmett's turn was next, he flexed his cue, trying to impress Courtney and it snapped over his head.  
Courtney giggled and pouted.  
"How are we suppost to win now? You'll have to get a new stick!"  
I stood up and waggled my finger.  
"No! The rules say that you have to play to the end with the stick you have. Serves you right for trying to show off."  
They both pouted. Emer smiled, this was going to be easier then she thought.  
Emmett tried to take his shot by swinging it at the ball, it wasn't having much luck, it flew off the table and under the sofa. He waddled over to it and picked it up. Paula clutched the coach and her mini skirt at the same time.  
Edward stood up for his turn. He smiled at potted three balls by chain reaction. He was such a maths nerd.  
Emers turn, She turned her back to the table and positioned her cue next to the ball. She pushed the bottom of it down and the ball flung up in the air. There was a sharp intake of breath as it made its way back to earth.  
The ball landed in the corner pocket. The room erupted in cheers.

Emer POV

Gewan ya boyo I thought to myself. I didn't think I'd sink 4 balls in the one go. Talk about luck! Or was it skill?

"Whoah, where did that come from shortie?" Emmett asked as a shocked expression flashed across his face.

"Umm beginners luck." I said quickly. But I knew my cards were marker so I owned up.

"Well Shortie I didn't think you had it in you, your the most convincing hustler I've ever seen."

Edward let out a huge laugh and bent over to whisper in my ear.

"He knows he can't win with a broken cue and Courtney..."  
A giggle escaped my lips. This was it there was four balls left on the table one stripes, one solids, the eight ball and of course the white ball. Courtney was up. No pressure on the poor girl!

**Alive Pov  
**Courtney stood up for her turn. This was it the moment of truth, the moment that would determine the game..  
Everyone held their breath in anticipation. Courtney stood up, she was shaking. She knew what this meant.  
I took me top off to lighten the mood.  
A few people looked but most of them were focused on Courtney's outrageous warm up moves.  
She kept doing running man with the cue.  
Edward was getting irritated.  
"JUST GET ON WITH IT WILL YOU."  
She stopped her running, shocked and then pouted. She leaded in to take the shoot.  
Courtney leaned on the table and lined up her cue to the ball.  
Suddenely there was a loud CRACK!  
The pool table started to dent under her. The balls began to role off the table.  
The ball she was going to hit flipped off the table and collided with her head, she fell backwards.  
Emer and Edwars ball was close to the corner pocket.  
It was stuck and it wouldn't go in. Edward, looking off into space, jumped.  
The ball fell into the pocket.  
Everyone was stunned, Emer was the first one to snap out of it.  
"Agghhhhh!!!FUCKIN' HELL EDDIE. WE WON!"  
She jumped on Edward and the started making out majorly.  
Everyone cheered at first but then looked away when it got awkward.

Then they realised I wasn't wearing a top!

Emer POV

I never knew Edward was so strong. He picked me up and sat me down on the half broken pool table. I don't know how but over the period of an hour I felt myself and Edward had gotten so close and we would make the most amazing hustling duo. I completely lost track of time when all of a sudden there was an awkward cough. I opened my eyes and pulled away to see Alice standing with her top off and everyone sitting around in silence.

Weird...

"What's going on?" I asked.  
"Whoah buddy I didn't know you had it in you!" Emmett came over and slapped Edward across his back. I felt sorry for Courtney but no one wanted to see her and Emmett with their tongues stuck down each others throats 24/7. Alice looked happy enough but at the same time I was slightly disturbed by the fact her top and Jasper had disappeared.

Suddenly Jenny came down the stairs giggling with Dave following close behind her, his eyes falling out of their sockets as he watched her glide down the stairs. When they reached the bottom after staring into each others eyes for about 5 minutes Jenny asked.

"What did we miss?"

Just then Alice got a vision, the whole room went silent and time came to a stop.

**Alice POV**

It had been an amazing night.

Eddie and Emer were allowed to have a relationship out in the open, but I hoped it wouldn't be as bad as Courtney and Emmett's relationship if they had won. No walls could contain their love, or I should say loving. I shuddered at the thought.

I guess I was just grateful that at least now they didn't have an excuse to mortify us all.

I was also wondering what had happened to my top? Emer said she had seen Jasper take it off somewhere. He was such a cheeky devil, trying to make me spend all night in just my bra!

I guess I was a little drunk from the Blood flavored alcoholic punch that Roisin had concocted.

All of a sudden the lights of the room dimmed, and so did the people. A vision hit me between the eyes and it felt like a knife in the brain.

The room around me was deadly silent watching as my mind took a battering from the vision.

"JASSSSPPPERRRRR!" I screamed back to the present, with tears in my eyes. Edward had been holding me so i hadn't hit into anything.

I struggled out of his arms and searched the room for my husband.

"COME HERE RIGHT NOW, JASPER WHITLOCK CULLEN!" I screamed like a dieing woman over the silence.

Jasper, who had been out hunting at the time struggled his way through the crowd of people. The was panic and fear in his eyes. He had heard me screaming and had rushed back as fast as he could.

He sat down on the floor next to me and gently put his arms around me. I sat there for a while just breathing him in, until I remember why I had been screaming in the first place. I pulled away from him and looked into his eyes.

He looked like a lost puppy.

"Www..What did you see?" He whispered.

I stared at him, he didn't know how bad this was, how horribly this could mess up everything. What I could lose, what everyone could lose. I finally sighed.

"I say Maria, She coming back to get you Jasper. She wants you back."

There was a collective gasp as the room came to terms with those words.

Maria was going to be here soon and she would stop at nothing to get what she wanted.

Emer POV

"Rally the troops!" I shouted as loud as I possibly could. Everyone that had been here the night before were suddenly in the living area. Myself and Edward sat at the top of the room holding hands, Emmett's facial expression was priceless to say the least as he made a gagging motion and whispered something in Courtney's ear. What happened next is quite literally indescribable.

"We all know why we're here" I said knowing everyone was completely uncomfortable with what Courtney and Emmett were doing.

"No we don't!" I knew that stupid smug Northern Irish accent anywhere.

"Eoghan, SHUT THE FUCK UP." I said in a stern tone, I could run the Irish army if I really wanted to. "Roisin please get your bitch out of the room if he is going to be like this."

"With pleasure" Roisin replied obviously knowing what a mistake it was marrying that absolute SOD.

"No I want to know exactly what's going on. I have to protect you, I love you." Eoghan said after hearing Roisins comment.

"Well all we know is this crazy shite called Maria is coming to try and take Jasper away from us." Paula said.

"That dirty hoe!" Aoife added.

"Now guys lets not verbally assault her when it's not to her face. Alice has told me that she will be arriving in about half an hour, we need to pick a spot to meet with her!" I said.

"THE MEADOW!!!" Everyone cheered in unison.

"Ok lets go people!"

We arrived at the meadow after forty five minutes of hair, make up and fancy dress. We all looked uber chic in our army gear. I always knew it would come in handy. We arranged our lines from strongest to weakest. It was our seven, the Cullens and Rob in the first line. Eoghan whined so much about having to protect Roisin we had to move him from the back line up to us. Stupid twat. The second line was made up of the wolves and the rest of our vampire friends. The last line was the leprechauns and the rest of the fairytale creatures. We had about 50 people all together, more than enough if you ask me.

"Here Roiko (Irish slang for 'thick country vegetable')" I called over to Eoghan. "Your safer in the back." But the stubborn little bitch wouldn't listen. We braced ourselves. It was his funeral.

**Alice POV  
**Eoghan thought he was such a brave shite because he had faced Simon Cowel and lived.  
He hadn't seen anything yet. Maria emerged from the forest wearing a look of determination and hatred.  
I rolled up my sleeves and stared her down. That bitch wasn't getting anywhere near MY Jasper!  
She came to a stop close to the trees, probably a back up escape plan. _Leg it in the opposite direction if the wife gets dangerous.  
_Emmett and Courtney were once again snogging the face off each other.  
"THIS IS NOT THE TIME, YOU TWATS!" I screamed at them from across the field.  
Courtney jumped off Emmett and took a step back, eyes raised to heaven in mock innocence.  
Maria giggled and I wanted to rip her throat out. I lunged at her but a strong arm caught me by the waist and held me tight.  
I was about to bite it off when Jasper's calming voice filled me ears.  
"Darling, Relax. She wants me but I will never go with her. I love you." He cooed.  
I smiled smugly and stuck my tongue out at Maria. She was now getting very annoyed watching me and Jasper.  
I could see in her eyes she wanted a fight to the death for Jasper. Who was I to run away from a good beat down?  
I accepted with a slight nod of my head. I then turned to Jasper and kissed him sweetly.  
"I love you too." He loosened his grip on me, and thats when I struck. I jumped into the air, turned and ran at Maria, fangs extended.  
She started running towards we also.  
I heard Jaspers yelling for me to turn back, but it was to late.  
Maria and I collided and began the epic battle that would change everything.

Emer POV

We saw Maria come out of the forest at a great speed and I have to admit I've never seen Alice so tense in all my life. Courtney and Emmett were all over each other again, we had to do something to enforce the fact that we had won and they would just have to restrain themselves!

Alice legged it while we were all distracted by Courtney and Emmett's... moment. The crashing noise that came next was terrifying, according to reliable sources it could be heard in Dundrum. Jasper tried to run for Alice but within a sixty ninth of a second Edward, Carlisle and Rob were on top of him.

Everything was happening so quickly, Alice and Maria were talking tears at each other but the fight seemed to be going nowhere. Nobody was sure what to do but then all of a sudden Eoghan was striding across the meadow.

"Come back here you arsehole." I screamed after him.

"DO YOU WANT TO KILL YOURSELF YOU ABSOLUTE PLANK?" Roisin added.

"I have to protect you, you're my moon and stars and sky and...."

BANG! Maria came plummeting across the field at a great speed, Alice after throwing her (seriously don't mess with the pixie when she's angry and don't try to take her man, something we realized from day one.) and crushed Eoghan on impact when they collided.

"Oh dear." I sighed. "I'm not touching the corpse it might have rabies..."

"We'll do it!" The leprechauns cheered from behind us. "Quiggles made our life a living hell. The stupid poetic little twat."

"DING DONG THE WITCH IS DEAD!" the rest of the leprechauns sang.

The fight continued I wasn't sure what the outcome would be but I could tell that Alice did and she was beaming her white teeth completely exposed.

It was only now I notice Roisin was frozen but not with grief but a combination of shock and joy. While the fight continued between Alice and Maria we all suddenly heard quickly approaching hoofs. Everyone braced themselves for a fight to the death. No one would win this fight... But quickly I noticed there was only one horse. This wasn't much of a fight, BORING. All of a sudden there was a glow from the forest and a man on a noble steed rode through the trees. Could it be? No way. But Roisin answered all of our questions.

"Its Jonathan Rhys Meyers"

**Alice POV**  
I launched a round-house kick at Maria. She flipped back and swiped at me in the process. Maria landed on the ground with a thud and clenched her fists. I knew what was coming next and I also knew I couldn't avoid it. She punched me square in the jaw and I spun backward. Stars appeared in my eyes. I hit the ground and pain shot through my right side. I lay there, crumpled, spitting blood. Maria laughed an evil laugh and slowly made her way towards me. I pleaded with Edward to not let the manic, wailing Jasper go. This all had to happen, it was destiny.  
Maria looked down at me and smiled.  
"How does it feel to finally get what you deserve, Alice?" She snap at my name.  
Slowly Maria leaned into my neck, ready to rip of my head and claim her prize. Thats when I struck.  
I reached up and grabbed her neck, pulling her to the ground. She yelled out in surprise.  
Before that STUPID bitch could fight back, I sunk my teeth into her neck and ripped at her throat. Her head rolled off and rested by a large stone.  
I lay there on the ground. I felt so tired all of a sudden. Everyone was gobsmacked. I guess that hadn't thought I had it in my.  
"Get off me ED-PUSSY! Let me go to my FRICKING wife, for Jebus' sake." Jasper broke the thick silence with his frantic shouts.  
Edward let go and Jasper bolted to my side. He held me in his arms and looke into my eyes.  
"Wow, honey I didn't know you were such a foxy hell cat." He smiled cheekily at me. "Maybe we could bring some of that to the bedroom.  
"Well, I am the legal age now and all." I replied.  
"What?" He asked, a confused look on his face.  
"Nothing." He raised his eyes to heaven and helped me up.  
We were walking back towards the other when Emer started cheering.  
"WOOOOW! Alice that rocked! We should be calling you SUPER DEADLY NINJA from now on! We're so having a party to celebrate this victory" She jumped for joy.  
I hugged her and we walked back arm in arm. Before we had gotten even two steps we all stopped, astonished at the sight before us.  
"Is that Jonathan Rhys Meyers?" I asked, head tilted.  
"Or whats left of him." Said Emer eyes bulging.  
"Jez, Roisin didn't take you long to get over Eoghan, did it?" Edward looked horrified.  
Emmett was smiling like a perverse Twat!  
We pushed the censored Roisin and Jonathan out of the way and continued walking.  
"So what's going to happen to the bodies in the field?" Courtney spoke up finally after being sin binned for her display in before the battle.  
"Well Eoghan's already been cleared away by the Leprechauns. As you can see from the smoke behind you they are now working on Maria and as for Roisin and Jonathan (Who will be known as Jo from now on), Well they'll be getting married soon because I'm pretty sure it's illegal to do that if you're not." I explained so that Courtney wouldn't be any further traumatized.  
Out of the bushes Jen and Dave appeared carring something wrapped in a small blue blanket.  
"Jen please don't tell me that's what I think it is!" Emer yelled.

Emer POV

"Jenny please tell me that's not what I think it is!" I tried to ask calmly.

"Oh freakin' hell Jenny, don't tell me you did it again?!" Aoife said.

"Did you inherit some of Eoghans stupid?!" Courtney asked and then skipped back over to Emmett pretending to be all innocent.

"You're a shite actress!" I screamed after her with a smug grin on my face.

Jenny chuckled darkly.

"I'm sorry guys. I couldn't help it."

"Jenny its a feckin homicidal animal ye feckin fecker!" Paula screamed.

"But its sooooooo cute." Courtney added.

"Its a murderous Jigglypuff its fudgin bipolar, it's not cute!"

"EVERYBODY HIT THE DECKS!" I screamed as everyone ran towards are house. It was just our seven, Edward, Alice, Jasper and Jo left in the meadow.

"Oh holy Jan-de-hay-sus!" I said as the little yoke started singing and dancing around with a lino cutter from Ms Maguire's art room.

"We're all gonners!" Aoife said. "Oh woe, oh death how I knew you'd find me, oh pain, oh ag-oh...."

**WHAT!!! **Why is Courtney dancing round with the little freak.

The little freak took a stab at Emma.

"Oh now it's on like Courtney on Emmett!" I said. "Your going down Jiggly freak!"

"Jiggly Juggly Jaggly BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"See what you've done Jenny!" Paula shouted.

I jumped and disappeared the evil fluffy thing looked confused. I reappeared and landed smack on its head.

"GAHHHHHH!" it screamed and took a stab at me with the art knife.

It barely missed my ankle. It caught my designer shoe, I was PISSED! I vanished again and while I was gone I could see everyone in the house cheering me on. This gave me brand new hope. Bring it!

I reappeared. And smacked the little thing again. I knew one more blow and it would be gone. I can't believe Jenny would bring this horror upon us again. But I didn't think of anything but the victory party that should be taking place in the house now. The furry thing retreated toward the trees I knew I couldn't catch it, I wasn't quick enough. All of a sudden Edward was on his feet sprinting into the forest after it. Within a minute he came back through the trees, flaming Jiggly Puff in hand.

"Woo barbeque!" Emmett screamed.

"We did it Eddie! YAY!" I ran to him and gave him a big hug.

"It was all you babe!" he replied. "your a feisty little demon aren't you, and we all thought Alice was good! You're just as protective over your clothes!£  
"Why thank you! You were pretty hot yourself superman."

"Come on we have a party to go to!"

We strolled across the meadow. I was so excited we were going to get HAMMERED! I love victory parties!

**Alice POV**

"The Victory Part-ee!" Emmett boomed around our big house, as if every drunk person didn't already know why they were here.

There was a large group of incapacitated Vampires around Emer who kept saying '_I love you man, I just (*hiccup) You rocked my jiggly killing socks. _or...

_Emer.....Will you marry me? (*Collapse)_

"AC/DC's" song 'Girl's Got Rhythm,' bleared through the room.

Emer and Edward bopped onto the dance floor.

_I've been around the world,  
I've seen a million girls  
Ain't one of them god  
Well my lady she's god  
She stealin' the spotlight  
Knocks me off my feet  
She's enough to start a landslide  
Just a walkin' down the street  
Wearing dresses to tight  
And looking dynamite  
Enough to blow me around  
No doubt about it can't live without it_

Chorus:  
The girl's got rhythm (Echo)  
The girl's got rhythm (Echo)  
She's got the backseat rhythm (Echo)  
The girl's got rhythm (aww)

Jaspergrabbed me and we danced like dirty whores on the new dance floor next to Emer and Eddie.  
_  
She's like a lethal brand  
Too much for any man  
She gives me first degree  
She really satisfies me  
Love me till I'm lifeless  
Aching and sore  
Enough to stop a freight train  
Or start the third world war  
You know I'm losin' sleep  
But I'm in too deep  
Every body needs love  
No doubt about it can't live without it_

Chorus

The Guitar solo played and we all rocked our air guitars.  
_  
You know she moves like sin  
And when she lets me in  
It's like liquid love  
No doubt about it can't live without it_

Chorus

You know she really got the rhythm  
She's got the backseat rhythm  
Rock 'n' roll rhythm  
The girl's got rhythm.

The party continued in that fashion for most of the night. A cake was made for me and Emer in the shape of a bonfire, which suited us both. Even though we couldn't eat it the werewolf were more then happy to take it off our hands.

Jasper had dared Emmett to streak out side the house. So currently there was a big naked idiot shaken his butt out side the window. Courtney was hysterical, trying, and failing to cover his gun with a towel.

Paula and Jacob were getting cozy on the coach. He was lying over her lap giggling and she was smoking a pipe. I decided not to ask. Aoife was in the corner bobbing her head like a depressed Goth.

I ran up to her and grabbed her hand. She tried to resist by grabbing my other wrist and squeezing but I was having none of it. I had gotten onto the dance floor before the lack of blood circulation started bothering me. I shook her off and pushed her into the dancing Embry. Then I went off to find Jasper.

Emer POV

This party was off the hizzle! I don't know what class of idiot had asked him to do it but Emmett was running around outside completely naked with Alice and Emer are superwomen tattooed across his back in what looked like... my eyeliner. Oh someone was going down for that in the morning for this but as Edward danced his bronze hair swayed to the rythm... I was totally mesmerized.

"VIC-TOR-EEEEEEEE!" Emmett screamed from outside as he charged at Roisin and Jo who had been sharing a moment in the moonlight.

They jumped up immediately, looking totally appalled by Emmett's little show... Courtney was still giggling and chasing him around. I was so relieved when she finally chased him into the forest... bang goes that innocence!

We went back to dancing and Emma was spinning tracks up at the DJ booth. Aoife requested Shane Ward and Emma dived down from the booth, threw a duvet cover over Aoifes head and dragged her up the stairs. Paula took this as an opportunity to take control of the music booth and was quickly rooting in a box full of CD's to find the biggest mini rave of the century song as the bass started the whole room was on their feet. I don't know when it happened but the guys who I was talking to earlier in the night before I'd sobered up were suddenly surrounding us.

"Do you mind if I cut in?" A voice asked from behind us.

"Yes." I replied quickly still in a trance over Edwards hair.

"Not at all but I want her back after this song!" Edward answered for me.

Knowing there was no getting out of this I turned around to see who was cutting in.

"Lucas?" I asked.

"The one and only." He replied. "So I saw you kick some Jiggly butt out there today! Kudos to you, your still as feisty as I remember."  
"Well it's hard to brake a bad habit!" I replied. "How has life been treating you?"  
"Not bad still on the High School Musical reunion tour. I can't believe the fans still think that plastic surgery is the reason we're all still beautiful. I heard you moved here and thought I'd drop in to see how you were. I was kinda hoping you weren't with some one."

"Well unfortunately Lucas, you did a Courtney on it and missed your window of opportunity. I have a life now, and a steady relationship I'm not throwing it all away!"

"You know I'll always be here" he said and then he broke into song. "I just wanna be with you."  
"Please, you know the singing stopped working on me."

I hugged him and then we started to dance and sing or was it scream along with the music.

"OOOOOOOH BLACK BETTY  
BAM BA LAM!  
OOOOOOOH BLACK BETTY  
BAM BA LAM!"

The room cheered. Everyone was depressed when the song ended except for me, I dashed as quickly as I could back over to Edward and dived into his arms. I didn't notice much on the the way back over other than Roisin and Jo on the horse galloping around the garden and Jenny running up the stairs with Dave close behind her.

All of a sudden Alice was behind me with a huge smile stretching across her face.

"We have something to tell you" she said to me and Edward.


	5. Fadhbanna Agus Bru

**TwOURlight Chapter 5**

**Fadhbanna agus Bru (Problems and Pressure)  
**

**  
The Lead up to the wedding has been amazingly stressful! But will I be able to cope when push comes to shove? Find out now!  
**

**Thanks for all the reviews ******

**Hope you like it**

**X**

Alice POV

XXX

I walked down the stair feeling like I just served up a big dessert of revenge, and it was sweet. I contemplated how cool it would be to pat myself on the back when all of a sudden I got a vision. It was very powerful and full of emotion. I was pulled forwards and began tumbling down the stairs. I didn't feel it though, I was sucked in.

_It was night time._ _Emer lay in her Gothic style four-poster bed. She was listening to calming music. The window flew open and she shot up, alert. The white net curtains flapped in the wind like waves in the ocean. A dark figure appeared and she gasped, startled. Edward flew into the room and enveloped her in a hug before she could scream. She sighed and returned the hug._

"_Edward, its you." They held each other._

"_Are you ready?" He whispered into her ear._

"_Yeh, My luggage is in the car." she smiled. Edward smiled back._

"_Then lets go fair maiden. I will rescue you from your wedding." _

_Emer giggled._

"_To Carl Isle we go." She whispered._

"_To carl Isle we go." Edward replied and they both jumped out the window. _

The vision began to ripple from the middle like a pebble was dropped in it. Reality spread through me and my body felt real again. I sat up, I was alone at the bottom of the stairs. The boys were out hunting. The girls had gone shopping before I had got up. I scotched over to the wall and held onto my knees.

Emer was leaving. They were leaving together....Why? ..Why plan this and still continue the wedding? Why not tell me? They were bound to know I would find out. Unless they didn't know yet! I had to keep this to myself at all costs.

Emer POV

I can't do this. I thought to myself. I was being pulled in ten million different directions and everyone expected so much from me and I knew I would completely blow it! Why couldn't it just be me and Edward and a witness or two, I'm not a big fancy wedding kind of girl... not an OTT person at all, but how could I do this without hurting Edward? Ugh stress of life, I hate it *emoness radiated around the room*. I sighed when all of a sudden Edward was by my side.

"You really have to remember I can read your mind!" He said with a Cheshire cat grin spread across his face.

"But you were hunting.... and you??!!" I said frantically I was seriously mentally unstable.

"Don't worry about me! Just let me worry about you!"

"Oh sorry..."

"Listen to my plan, its sooooooooooooo cool! Yay!!"

"You know you sound like Jenny?" Edward scowled. "...Continue!"

"You and me are going to get out of Forks, we're going to go away and get married with a witness or two. If your friends really love you they'll let you go."

"I love you! Your my little genius with amazing hair!" I giggled and I kissed his cheek.

"We depart tonight. Be ready."

And with that he was gone.

There was a loud scream from downstairs. I slid down the banisters being the child that I am and saw Alice looking in the mirror! Vainer I thought to myself but then I saw her face. Oh dear lord... "It's not as bad as it looks" I mimed to her and then glanced in the mirror. I screamed but when I turned around Alice was gone. Why did I hve freckles and ribbons and... Courtney! I was going to murder that child when Alice was done with her! This new look is totally interfering with my emo vibe. Stupid Courtney! I thought to myself. SHIT I HAVE TO PACK!

I ran upstairs and started flinging all the nice clothes I could find in my wardrobe onto my bed in a neat enough pile by my standards. Then I clapped eyes on the 2 wedding dresses. One was obviously intended for me to wear it was a pretty traditional wedding dress in the most beautiful shade of white, it was pretty average other than the fact that the bottom of the dress was pure netting making it extremely floaty... I'd look like a white woman if I wore that! Then I clapped eyes on the other dress, it was definitely made with me in mind it was slightly above the knee a corset at the top that flow out towards the end... WOW I loved it! I threw the shorter one onto the bed and left the longer one in my wardrobe then checked my list.

Clothes.... check!

Toiletries... check!  
Dress.... check!  
Money...... check!  
Eyeliner.... check!

Alice had a tea party planned for this afternoon, and I was already late! I dashed out of the room before she could come looking for me!

Alice POV

I sat in my newly bought summer dress, legs crossed, eyes down. The flowered pattern china cup in my hand was shaking. If anyone had happened to look at me sitting in the corner, there's no doubt they would have thought I was drunk. I was in fact very nervous. I had organised a tea party for the pre-wedding party but because of what I had seen last night I wasn't looking forward to facing Edward let alone Emer! I spent along time trying to remember very precise details of naked Jasper as Edward had avoided me for a week the last I had seen that in my head. Emer would be more difficult. I needed to avoid her completely, she would know something was wrong. They entered the room at that thought and everyone got up and clapped.

I smiled timidly but stayed sitting, no need to draw attention to myself. I was just so confused! Why leave without any explanation? They should have their family there, someone to witness. Suddenly I got the best idea ever! Me and Jasper would follow them to the Isle and then they would have to let us stay.

I contemplated telling Courtney but I knew she would just spill the beans on this. Plus she was still tied up in her room with the sharpie eye patch and beard I drew on earlier. I still had the glasses but I had got used to them and was now working the look rather well. I took a deep breath and began to relax.

I stood up and made my way over to the open bar for some Tecilla.

Hehehe...... Oww SHIT! Edwards walking over. Okay. Hmmm.. and Jasper has small mole right above his....

Edward clutched his head in pain and ran in the other direction scream ' It BURNS!'

I chuckled and continued on my quest to get incredibly drunk, but not aggressive drunk which I had been told not to repeat again by Roisin.

I sat at the bar, drink in hand. Emmett was sitting next to me.

"Alice...What time is it?" He asked innocently. I eyed his blurry face suspiciously.

"Well..OWW FUCK! YOU"RE so MeeeeeAN!" I was still holding my drink and I tipped it into my lap when I check my watch.

I jumped up and tried to clean my lap. Emmett was laughing like a hyena. I smacked him across the head and he jerked forward and hit his head off the mixed nuts bowl in front of him. Nuts went flying everywhere.

"Try hold onto your nuts Emmett!" Emer appeared out of nowhere.

I knew I should have run away but I was doubled over in laughter. I *laugh,laugh.....Think I need to get....*Pain in stomach...AwAAY!

"So what's going on Home dog?"

"Mmm, nothing and I...Mmm Oww look a squirrel." Emer turned around confused and I used it to make my escape.

A few more hours and they were gone...and so was I. ;)

Emer POV

"I LOVE SQUIRRELS! I HAD A PET SQUIRREL BEFORE BUT THEN ROISIN...." I whipped back around knowing Alice didn't enjoy addressing the back of my head. But she was gone. "Oh that cuts... That was a sick joke bitch!!!"

"What's wrong shortie? Don't get your undies in a twist...." Emmett said trying to get me back for the nuts gag earlier.

"Well unfortunately I wouldn't have any to get in a twist babe." I responded. That could possibly get me in a lot of trouble with the sharpie fairy for that comment later... but it was worth it! His face was priceless and kind of scary. If only Alice was here she'd laugh her ass off! And then it hit me.

Something was wrong Alice was my besty she'd never do something like that.... Oh feck Eddie she knows!!! I thought to myself. Thank God Jenny wasn't able to hear me, she was way to busy controlling Roisins firepower. She giggled as a huge fountain of fire sprayed out of the fairy cakes.

"Mwah ha ha I am firewoman! Death to all humans." She said and the room erupted into hysterics. All but Roisin who was sensationally pissed over the fact that Jenny could control her power and she couldn't.

"SHIT EVERYBODY HIT THE DECKS!!!" Jenny scream as Roisin began to charge furiously around the room. I jumped up over Emmett's head onto the bar knowing that the ground was the most dangerous place to be. I could see Emmett about to glance around to see if I was telling the truth about that undies comment and as he did I landed him with a kick square in the jaw. He howled and muttered something that sounded remotely like Whoah Eddie picked a fiesty bitch, lucky! Ha ha, he wished! But as Roisin charged around the room I remembered that I needed to find Alice if she knew we were in trouble. Before Emmett could respond I vanished up the stairs after Alice. I needed this, this was my happy ending and I couldn't believe my best friend was the only one who could stand in my way at the minute.

Alice POV

I raced up the stairs to Courtney's room and stood there in the door way panting. That was faster then I had ever run before. I heard Emer running up the stairs after me and I knew I had no choice but to talk to her. I closed the door and backed into the corner of the room. Courtney sat on the chair wiggling and trying to call for help.

"Mgprphhhhhh!"

I told her to be quiet or else, but the door was kicked of the hinges by a very pissed looking Emer. I bit my lip and looked at the ceiling.

"You know DON'T YOU!" She screamed.

"Yeh, I do! I saw it in a vision. How did you think I wasn't going to find out about this?? Remember I DO have visions of the future. Don't you love us?" I gesture a lot when I'm lecturing.

Emer stepped back as if she'd been slapped.

"I'm sorry. That came out wrong." I sighed and sat on the bed. Emer seeing Courtney for the first time grabbed her and dropped kicked her into the hall. She then sat next to me on the bed and put her arm around me.

"I'm sorry to. This isn't how I wanted to do it. All I wanted is a small wedding on the beach with Edward and it turned into a circus. Wedding's should be about love not money."

"Don't you want us there though? We love you! All we wanted was for you to have a great day." I smiled weakly at her. Emer looked like she wanted to cry.

"I should have told you." She whispered. I put my arm around her. We sat there for a while in silence.

"You know that even if you go alone, there's no way I'm going to be left at home." I smiled at her. "Me and Jasper will be right behind you."

She smiled cheekily in return. I gasped as I had a quick flash of a vision.

"what is is??" Emer asked nervously.

"Don't worry about everyone else. They'll be fine." I winked at her and got up to leave. For the first time all day I felt light again. Like the weight of the world had left my shoulders.

Emer POV

Okay time to find Eddie... I thought to myself. It felt so good that Alice knew everything!, but I had ruined Edwards plan. Well he did! Stupid men always planning in advanced, that sucked but at least I had Alice on my side now! What is going on? The room began to spin and all of a sudden I felt really woozy, what was happening to me? ***Crash***

"Haha Shortie! Revenge is sweet." I heard a voice boom from above me. A quiet giggle that sounded like Courtney came from behind the other voice, what is with her? Has she turned against us?!

***CRASH***

"AHHHH" that was Courtneys squeal without a doubt!

"What did you do to her?!" Wait, Edward!

"Dude don't worry! I didn't hurt her." Emmett moaned

"How could you? You stupid overgrown lump of meat!"

"Dude I didn't hurt your girlfriend give it up!"

"Ahhh!" Ugh Courtneys voice echoed around in my head.

Wait why am I moving? I tried to open my eyes to see what was going on but when I tried my whole body went limp.

"Honey, you're going to be okay, I'm taking you home." Edward said, his voice was so gentle.

"What did he do to me?" I managed to mutter.

"I think he put something on your lip gloss. He has done stuff like that before!"

I chuckled quietly to myself but he heard me any way.

"Whats up?"

"He's just pissed 'cos I wound him up."

"What did you..."

"Then kicked him in the jaw."

"Why would you...?"

"He tried to look up my skirt!"

I could feel Edward about to drop me and go back for him when I screamed.

"I provoked him. Don't go after him, I never want to be Courtney's babysitter ever again!"

"Well I suppose you are quite irresistible, the poor guy didn't have a chance! But there was no need for him to hurt you!"

"You're right! I have something to tell you! Alice knows! She saw us and she's gonna follow us to Carlisle!"

"Well if she wants to come and you don't mind then I don't mind."

"Sorted!"

I lay in my bed and put on my soothing Metallica CD. I tossed and turned for what seemed like hours and then it was time.

"Don't worry fair maiden!" Edward said and beamed at me "I'm here to rescue you from your wedding."

"My stuff is in the car!"

"Well then to Carl-Isle we go!"

"To Carl-Isle we go!"

We jumped out the window and headed for my lime green porshe, this was suddenly perfect again! As we jumped into the car there was a sudden giggle from the back seat. As I whipped my head around I saw it was Alice and Jasper.

"YAY maid of honour!" Alice said with a huge smile on her face.

Alice POV

I legged it out of the room to go find Jasper and pack for tonight. There was a crash and some shouting behind me but I wasn't to bothered, I needed to find some amazing outfits with a simple wedding on the beach theme with just enough slut factor. This was going to be fun!

xxx

After packing my suitcase and Jaspers we were ready to go. I heard Emer and Edward upstairs talking and we decided to sneak into the back seat. I giggled as they got into the car, this was just to exciting.

"YAY maid of Honour!" I squealed. Emer was surprised to find us there but she smiled.

"YAY Bride! WOOW." She replied. We all laughed as Edward put the car in reverse and speed away.

XXXX

It was 8 in the morning and we were on our way to the airport. We drove down the highway with all the windows open, wind in our faces, hope in our hearts.

"Born to be Wild" by Steppenwolf.

Get your motor runnin'

Head out on the highway

Lookin' for adventure

And whatever comes our way

Yeah Darlin' go make it happen

Take the world in a love embrace

Fire all of your guns at once

And explode into space

I like smoke and lightning

Heavy metal thunder

Racin' with the wind

And the feelin' that I'm under

Yeah Darlin' go make it happen

Take the world in a love embrace

Fire all of your guns at once

And explode into space

Like a true nature's child

We were born, born to be wild

We can climb so high

I never wanna die

Born to be wild

Born to be wild

**Coming Soon!!!!**

**Chapter 6- Love and Marriage**

**(You don't want to miss this one!)**

**Love your buddies Emer and Sive x**


	6. Surprise!

**TwOURlight Chapter 4**

**Surprises**

**This is all about the conversation Alice and I have and the consequences of it are! **

**Prepare for a shocker!**

**Hope you like it**

**X**

**Alice POV**

I pulled Emer off the stairs and ran away into the other room before Edward could get a look at what I had just seen in my vision. I dragged her through the dancing crowd and out through the back door. I didn't stop till I had gotten really far into the forest. I turned around to face her. Emer had a look on her face like 'what the hell was that all about.'

"You are going to feckin' flip when I tell you what I am about to tell you about something that is going to will happen soon."I questioned my sentence in my head.

"What, What,WHAT?????" She screamed.

"I think you should sit down."

She glared at me and crossed her arms. Apparently I had interrupted something with her and Eddie-weddie, the reason I brought her here.

"WEDDIE! Edward's going to ask you something. In a week. Something life changing! HAVE YOU GOT THE MESSAGE YET!"

She stared at me with dubfounded eyes. I always knew she was stupid under that hard core of hers.

"He has a feckin' ring for fecking feck's sake!" I jumped up and down, fists clenched. Emer's eyes light up with realization.

"But...what..and the .....FECK! You mean he ....and the me???" Emer staggered backwards and had to had to clutch a tree.

"Aghhh," I sighed from finally getting the massage across.

"You mean he wants to MARRY me???" She whispered. I nodded.

"I need to think about this for a while, Its just such a shock! Like my word does that boy ever have a girlfriend he DOESN'T marry?"

I shrugged. Emer pouted obviously slightly annoyed by my comment.

"Oh, plus I'm going to Esme Isle with Jasper tomorrow for our anniversary. We'll be back in a week."

Emer leaned forward and hugged me, which I thought was more for her support then my congratulation.

We slowly made our way back to the house and tried to think of a plan to keep what we knew from Eddie-Mush.

Emer POV

OH MY FOCKING GOOD GOLLY GOSH! Edward was... and he had... and we were.... and what I'm I going to do to keep this from him! We were about two minutes away from the house, that should give us enough time to think something through. As we strolled through the forest at a little over human speed a huge grin shot across Alice's face.

"I've got it." She said with an edge of excitement on her voice. "You think of naked Emmett and that should keep him out of your mind for a while!"

"Umm wouldn't that send across the wrong message, I don't want to put him off!" I answered.

"True." She said as she thought.

"I'm just going to think Courtney, yano... flowers, bunny rabbits, shopping, sparkles as well as adding in some of his pet hates like handbags and loud music."  
"I suppose that could work. Well I'm still thinking about naked Jasper!"

"I'm not going to stop you! Believe me."

We were within seconds of the house when Edward and Jasper came out of the house, Edward looking dashing as ever his bronze hair all wind swept and sexy.

"Hey Alice I heard about your plans!" He said.

"Oh well myself and Jazzy decided it was time for a vacation!" She replied quickly.

Edward flinched away from her thoughts obviously she was thinking of naked Jasper. I looked behind them and the party had wrapped up. One of these times I'll be there when that happens.  
"Well we have bags to pack! Goodbye!" Alice said quickly.

All of a sudden both Alice and Jasper were gone and honestly I didn't care, was Edwards hair even more dashingly bronze in the moonlight. Was that possible?

"Why thank you!" Edward said.

Oh shit Emer don't drop the ball! Haha bunny rabbits and knitted sweaters! Yeah thats right!

We were beside the random lake with the fish in it near our house when Edward said,

"I was wondering if you would like to stay the night with me? In the Cullen house, you must get sick constantly in the presence of your girlfriends?"

"Yep, you better believe it! Constant Courtney eventually makes you a little gone in the head!"  
We both giggled and then headed for the Cullen house.

We curled up under a blanket on they huge Cullen couch and watched West Side Story. This really was the happiest moment of my life.

Alice POV

I was so excited for my mini break with Jasper. We were in our room packing our clothes for the trip when I heard a noise downstairs. I dropped the yellow pokodot bikini I had in my hand and wandered to the door curiously.

"Aghhhhh!" There was a loud scream, it was unmistakably Courtney. I raised my eyes and signed. What had that child done now? I wandered down the hall catching snippets of the conversation as I went.

"....And the room.......Covered.....YOU....Clean!" Edward shouted. There was music playing which sounded like the theme song to the full Monty. I could feel a vision coming but I tried to shake it off, this sounded to good. I wanted it to be a surprise. I walked into the living room cautiously, unsure of what to expect, and BOY! I never would have guessed that.

Only Emer, Edward, Courtney and Emmett were in the room. The walls were splattered with what looked like Blood cake. It was specialty we only made for 150th Birthdays. Come to think of it, I might actually be Courtney's 150th Birthday today! I was so distracted with the cake on the walls I hadn't really taken in the rest of the room. Courtney sat on the sofa, eyes wide, mouth agape. Emer looked like she was about to bust a gut holding in her laughter. Edward was a very dangerous colour of red. What a wierdo, I didn't even know what he was ang.....

"OWWW HOLY MOTHER OF GOD! EMMETT, WHAT THE FECK?" I screamed with surprise. I wasn't expecting that!

Emmett was naked in the middle of a gigantic blood birthday cake with the words "COURTZ HAVE A HOT BIRTHDAY."

That Birthday cake wasn't lying was it! Emmett took a giant step through the side of the cake, exploding icing all over everyone. Edward looked like he was going to burst a blood vain, but Emer distracted him a bit by blowing kisses at him. Emmett began shaking his butt in Courtney's face, who was frozen from how bizarre everything all was. I was VERY revealed to find that Emmett was wearing a man thong, I guess it was better than nothing.

The whole time this was happening I still hadn't done anything, I had just stood by the doorway taking it all in.

I snapped out of that and did the only thing every self-respecting Vampire would do in this situation.....I pointed and laughed. I laughed till my stomache hurt.

I could very well say this was the greatest moment of all time and would be brought up in every possible conversation for the rest of time.

XXX  
I barely even noticed when we arrived at the island. I know it sounded like a cliche but me and Jasper were just staring into each other's eyes. When we arrived on the island it was nighttime. Jasper took my hand and helped me off the boat. We threw our bags at the front door of the house and took off our shoes. Jasper looked into my eyes and smiled. I smiled back, catching a reflection of the full moon in his eyes.  
We skipped down the sandy shore and just listen to the waves rolling back and forth under our feet. Finally we found a perfect stop.  
A bent palm tree stood in the water. It was like a nature made love seat, It was dark against the moonlight. Jasper climbed into the tree and I climbed onto his watched the moon make its way across the sky and stayed there till the sun came up. I snuggled into his arms and I knew this was heaven. Forever in time.

Emer POV

We had said our long goodbyes to Alice and Jazzy, I would really miss her! Over the last few months we really had become besties! But I secretly knew that once she went myself and Edward would get a whole lot closer. Within the space of and hour Courtney had moved in with Emmett, I thought of how innocent she was before we got here but hey what can I say Mary Jane got game!

Edward and I were playing a game of slaps which was incredibly painful in the Cullen house when Emmett and Courtney walked passed, Courtney was carrying her rabbits hutch while Emmett was carrying a watering can and a large flower pot. I'm guessing he didn't know about Courtney's love for nature, shopping and all things sparkly! I couldn't resist and I saw Edward couldn't either.

"Two words Emmett, MAN DOG!" I said.

Edward barked and we both laughed. Emmett was obviously slightly embarrassed

"Isn't that one word?" Courtney asked. Obviously all the Emmett had gone to her head.

"No but I know your favorite word!" Emmett replied and they ran up the stairs giggling.

"Do you want to come for a walk with me?" Edward asked.

"No I don't I think your gay." I replied.

"Oh ok..."

"Of course I do you mad egg!"

"Oh great, I have somewhere I want to show you."  
"It isn't that crappy meadow is it?"  
"No, that's not it. Come on."  
"Okey Dokey!" I replied automatically mesmerized by his hair.

"Wow is it really that amazing?!"  
Yes, yes it is I thought to myself.

We strolled through the forest chatting and laughing so much I'm surprised I didn't collapse... sooner. But it was ok because I collapsed straight into Edwards arms. I giggled and when I opened my eyes there were three sets of eyes staring back at me. My eyes immediately locked onto Edwards but the other two people were Jen and Dave. Dave looked quite... flustered and Jenny's hair was messy (not like her at all!).

"We were just talking a walk in the forest when we heard choking! Are you ok darling?" Dave asked.

"I'm good, thank you buddy!" I replied, so happy that Edward had caught me.

"Well my fair lady, we are going to love you and leave you! We have stuff to do back at the house!" Jenny said and Dave's face light up.

"Adios amigos!" I said in my incredible Brazilian accent.

"When did you learn Spanish?!"  
"Bye!" I said and I dragged Edward through the trees.

We were walking for another five minutes then Edward covered my eyes and picked me up.  
"Whoa Romeo!"

"Just shut up and let me carry you!" He said and we both laughed.

I could hear something when he put me down, it sounded like a tap, how romantic! But when I opened my eyes I was totally blown away. I didn't know there was waterfalls in Forks.  
"This.... is incredible" I said.  
"So are you." he replied.

I wasn't sure what to say back to that... the best thing I could think of was so are you but that wouldn't impress him. He was too perfect.

"I like it!" he said

Damn stupid mind reading inconvenience!  
"I heard that!"

"Emer I have something I've wanted to ask you for a while now. I just haven't found the right moment."

I looked at him with confused eyes, what was going on?

He got down on one knee.

OHHH I GET IT!

"Emer, I love you more than you could possibly imagine. Will you marry me?"

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD

If I had a properly functioning heart it would be beating so fast right now!  
"YES!" I said.

As much as I hate to admit it, we don't know what's wrong with us, but I started crying (must be like that male vampire thing...). My eyeliner made long stripes down my face. But Edward but a ring on my finger and hugged me so tightly that I could barely breath. I was head over heels, truly madly deeply.

**Alice POV  
**For three days I sat on the tree with Jasper. Since we were vampires we didn't need to eat or sleep. Just lying there was amazing. We talked during the daytime and just watched the moon make it's way across the sky at nighttime. I can honestly say that it was the happiest time of my life. Back on land we never got time just to be together for the sake of it. At sunrise on the fourth day I got up and stretched my arms. Jasper pouted, he was obviously sad at the loss of body heat.  
"What you doin'?" He asked curiously.  
"Not what I'm doing, what we're doing! We're going diving."  
"Come on! Let's just say here for a while longer. I was so comfy!"  
"You'll have to catch me first."  
I jumped off the tree and ran into the water, splashing and giggling. Jasper jumped off, laughing with me.  
He caught up with me at the edge of the shore and we both fell, head first into open water. I opened my eyes and looked around at the shimmering plants and fish. Most animals were afraid of vampires but the fish around Esme Isle must have been familiar with us because they swan close by us curiously.  
I pushed off my heavy jacket and trousers and swam deeper underwater in my bikini. (Which I had worn just for this occasion).  
Jasper, seeing me did the same. I reached out for his hand and he swam down to me.

Half an hour later we emerged from the water causing ripples in it's calm surface. I exploded in a fit of giggles, operantly one fish had liked Jasper a little too much and had swum up his shorts. The look of shock on his face was priceless. He grumbled angrily at me.  
"Mufuphh......It wasn't even that funny."  
"Your right it wasn't." I said deadly serious. "because I'm the only one allowed to do that."  
I smiled seductively. He returned the smile and the chased me off into the house to finally unpack the suitcases......Maybe.

Emer POV

Wow this was amazing. I never dreamt that all things this would happen to us in Forks. Edward and I walked back through the forest hand in hand, I looked like the Zebra from racing stripes but Edward didn't seem to care. I giggled at the thought of me without my eyeliner but at the minute I think I would have been better off with nothing.

"We have to tell everyone!" Edward said totally excited as we neared the Cullen house.

"Let me tidy myself up a bit first!" I replied.

"Fine!" he said "But I want you in my house within 20 minutes."  
"Will do honey."

I strolled in the back door expecting the house to be empty when I was met by six anxious pairs of eyes.

"What did he do to you?!" Paula asked.  
"Are you alright?" Aoife added.  
"What happened?" I'm pretty sure that was Jenny.  
"What did he say?!" I think that's Roisin.

"We can go beat him up!" No that's Roisin.

"Guys stop!" I said.

"But look at you you're a wreck!" Paula said.

"OH MY FUCKING GOD!" Jenny said "tell them on I will!" Jenny said.

Everyone else was immediately intrigued. I smiled and lifted my left hand but before I was able to say anything six over excited vampires threw me into the back wall.

"You lucky BITCH!" Courtney said, what had Emmett done to that poor girl?

"DIBS HEAD BRIDESMAID!" Roisin said quickly.

"Second in command!" Jenny snapped back

"Congrats, we're going to see Jacob and Embry now." Paula and Aoife said in unison. What were they brainwashed or something!

Suddenly I was so proud of us all, we'd come such a long way and now my road had hopefully stopped winding for a while.

"I'm heading over to the Cullen's place of you guys want to come!"

"We're in!" they all said together.

So me Jen, Roisin, Dave and Jo all strolled over to the Cullen's and I have to admit, I wasn't quite sure what to expect...

**Alice POV**

We had spent a magical week on the Isle. On the last day Jasper and I had put on classical music. We had twirled, danced and laughed around the house. It was nice just spending time together and being a normal couple but I was really looking forward to getting back and seeing everyone. I missed chatting with Courtney and scrunching Emer's soft, curly hair, (When she wasn't looking of course).

I sat in our private boat, named after me, and watched the waves crash on the side. Jasper was navigating because I didn't really care it. It took us the most part of the day but we finally made it back to land. Just one plane trip to Washington and then a quick run through the forest.

Cut forward to at the Cullen house.

I sighed with relief as the house came into view. It had been a long, tiring trip and I really wanted to put my feet up. I looked up and saw someone's bra hanging out of the window. There was loud music playing. It was a mad house, no doubt about that.

I entered the door and was greeted by an unusual sight. Everyone was in a line doing the can-can. They were all crazy shites! I ran in the middle of them and knocked Emer over in a hysterical hug. Everyone fell over with her because they were all connected. It was good to be home.

Emer POV

When we arrived at the house Edward had gathered everyone in the living area, my cloud were buzzing when we walked into the house but the rest of the Cullen's were clearly confused. I strolled over and stood beside Edward. My people stood behind his people grinning like Cheshire cats, ever Jo was smiling now.

"We have called you here today because we have an announcement to make." Edward started.

I just smiled not really knowing what to do as three pairs of confused eyes met me.

"I would like to introduce you to my soon to be wifey!" He said happily.  
The room erupted into cheers and Emmett came over to give Edward a pat on the back while I spoke to Esme, I could see Carlisle waiting to speak to Edward obviously happy with his son's choice.

"I never thought you had good taste in women, but now I see that you may have better taste than I originally thought!" Emmett said. "Finally you have a wife that's not a moany bore, good choice bro!"  
"I'm so glad to hear this news." Esme said happily "I haven't seen Edward like this years. Thank you." She hugged me and I really felt like a part of the family.

Then I glanced over and saw Carlisle strolling towards me. If I wasn't so in love with Edward I could definitely find him incredibly attractive.

"Well guys it seems we have something to celebrate! PARTAAY!!!!!!!!!!" Emmett said and Courtney added and enthusiastic whoop.

Wow I could get used to living like this! I love having these amazing parties every second week it's incredible and now I had my hubby , YAY!

This party was better than all the other ones though! Even though

we were still absolutely plastered, there was something more

intimate about this one. I suppose it was because there was less

people and the fact that we were now one big happy family.

Everyone was making speeches I'm pretty sure Emmett was first

with his 'honest man' speech. Followed by Courtney's 'Lets talk

about drugs' essay (I don't know what that had to do with marrying

Edward...). Then it was Carlisle with his how great it was to see two

people who made each other so happy thing that nearly had me

crying again followed by Rosin and Jo's rendition of 'Islands in a

stream' which they dedicated to us.

We had just started the Can Can when I was ploughed into a wall. What the hell!!!! ALICE!!!!!!!!!  
We both screamed and started jumping up and down like crazy fish out of water.  
"You came back!" I said.

"I didn't want to miss this!" She replied.

Yay I thought to myself my family together at last!

Then Edward was behind me, he wrapped his arms around my waist and said  
"The way it should be."

XXX

The next few weeks were absolutely incredible! I spent so much time in the Cullen house planning my wedding with Edward, Roisin (my head bridesmaid), Jenny (my second in command), Alice (my besty), Esme (Edwards mum) and Courtney. So much for weddings being a thing for husbands and wives! We were going to have the ceremony and the back garden as well as the after party, yes biggest party this year!  
Courtney and Alice dragged me to Milan to buy shoes, bags and other accessories in general for the wedding. We got white stiletto heels that were absolutely incredible! A white sequin bag that had to be one of the most amazing things I have ever seen and I got my amazing diamonds and make up that Alice and Courtney were going to apply on the day. I was starting to question whether or not that was a mistake?  
I left Alice and Courtney in charge of the venue, hair and make up which cheered them up significantly. Esme was also involved in the venue which gave me a little bit of re assurance. This was all because I couldn't bear to try and imagine what my dress would look like if they made it! The term deranged Barbie the nature loving pixie princess doll came to mind! But there was another very important job, and that was left to my right hand homeslice, my maid of honor, the one and only Roisin and that was my hen night.

Roisin POV (Finally!)  
It was the big night, well the start of two big nights for Emer! Around midday the guests started to arrive. Emer's Mam and Gran had come especially for the occasion and our good friend Pepi had reluctantly parted with Luke to join in the celebration. I'd also invited some of the girls Emer had met when she spent those two years in Brazil before we started travelling together. They kept calling her something in Spanish that sounded oddly like pole dancer but when I asked Emer what it meant she just went red and said it meant my good friend. I'd have to ask Jen to read her mind later.  
The night kicked off with my favorite drinking game. You have to clap back a beat and if you get it wrong you take a shot. Poor Courtney was completely lacking in any sense of rhythm and and before long she was on the table singing "Hey Mickey" and crying like there was no tomorrow. Since most people had already began to sing along Paula suggested we get the singstar going. Jen leapt on the mic as i was plugging it in so I decided to let her go first. She sang (well screamed!) her rendition of "I Need A Hero" in Irish. The timing was all off but by this stage everyone was pissed anyway and just cheered. Next Alice and I got up and wowed the crowd with "Final Countdown". But unfortunately I got a note wrong towards the end and Alice rugby tackled me through a wall. Metal note: Alice is an aggressive drunk!   
After making Alice inhale 8 cups of Maxwell houses finest we had our wedding dress making competition. Each team of three had 15 minutes to make a dress using natural materials they could find in the wood near our house. Suffice to say this did not go as planned Aoife and Paula were convinced a baby raccoon would make a lovely headdress and Emers Mam was reduced to tears when she saw her little girl all done up in her shawl of ivy... pity it was poison ivy.  
Since things were going so well I decided to have a few drinks, Well lets just say I had a few too many! As I was in the kitchen trying to understand the rapid flow of Spanish that was being said to me (frankly it could have been English and I still wouldn't have understood.) I heard a large crash from the main party area. "Fuck! We forgot to Granny proof the house!" Emer yelled over the music. Emers Gran had taken the song "Smack That" way too literally and had began to smack every valuable smash able object in the room. I soon realized it was the right time to call it a night. As all the guests departed I suddenly noticed I hadn't seen Courtney since we dragged her off the table. Me and Ciara found her in a corner singing what we think was a combination of "Happy Birthday" and "Old MacDonald" with the actions from "If Your Happy And You Know It" thrown in. My second in command (Jen) informed me that the lady of the moment had for some reason started obsessively making paper airplanes and was now handing them out to the guests as they left. We brought her to her room and made her lie down. Even if we don't sleep this should help her sober up. Just as I was finished cleaning up the lads returned home from the stags. "How was your night?" I asked Emmett. "Good, yours?"  
At that second Aoife regained consciousness "Why am I cradling a baby raccoon?" And by the look on Emmetts face I could tell his question had been answered.  
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**Alice POV**

I wasn't quite sure what had happened last night at the hen party, but I now knew that having a headache was actually a terrible experience. I lay in bed, terrified to move in case it made it worse. Jasper rolled over beside me and I inwardly groaned. I knew what he was going to do. Jasper sighed and kissed my cheek.

"Good morning honey."

His voice reverberated off the inside of my skull and made my brain start throbbing. I winced and he shook me, I think he thought I was having a bad dream. I tried acting calm so that Jasper would be fooled and leave me alone. I relaxed my tense shoulders and sighed heavily. Jasper sighed with relief and climbed out of bed. He hummed a tuneless tune and made his way to the bathroom to get ready. I rolled over slowly and decided to wait a few hours before I decided to rejoin the real world.

{*3 hours later.}

I walked past Esme in the hall and got an expression of utter shock. Emmett smiled like an idiot at me and I knew there was something wrong. I hadn't seen myself in the mirror yet and I was starting to dread it. I accidentally walked past one on the way into the kitchen and I let out a horrified scream. Jasper and Emer came running, surprised to only see me staring at myself.

"LOOK AT MY FACE! My beautiful face is ruined." Emer mimed silently, having nothing to comment on that. Somebody had drawn a big pair of Harry Potter style glasses on me with matching scar in Sharpie. Whoever it was was going to pay for this. I had a vision of Courtney running around her room with a Sharpie. She was trying to hide it franticly.

"COURTNEY! YOU WILL BURN FOR THIS." I ran up the stairs and swerved around the banister heading for Courtney.


	7. Our Trip To Carl Isle

_**Chapter six: Our Trip To Carl-Isle**_

_**The newest instalment to the tale of the Irish Vampirette's.**_

_**As Alice, Jasper, Edward and Emer make their way to Ireland what will they get up to?**_

_**This will be our last chapter for the next few weeks because myself and Sive have state exams! AHHH!**_

_**Well hope you enjoy it!**_

_**Please read and review!**_

_**Everything so far has been really helpful and we are so grateful that people took the time to read our story!**_

Emer POV

Myself and Alice spent the whole journey to Ireland singing an exciting arrangement of a combination of Cyndi Lauper and Madonna songs repetitively. Every so often Edward and Jasper would shout over us when we were singing Girls Just Wanna Have Fun. I spent the whole flight milling over wedding plans with Alice while Edward and Jasper repeatedly asked us to "shut the hell up". When we touched down in Dublin myself and Alice batted our eyelashes at the security guards and none of us were asked for passports. After we collected our bags we whirled around into the blue channel because we didn't need our bags torn apart by security. I immediately started laughing at the thought of some old fat guy strip searching Edward.

"I'd much rather it was you!" He said and then winked at me.

"Oh la la." Alice said immediately trying to shake off her vision.

When we walked through the door into the arrivals hall I glanced around for our taxi man knowing he would be waiting for us.

"Oh oh Eee-mur, over here." A northern Irish voice screamed at me from across the arrivals hall. There stood a short ridiculously thin man with torn skinny jeans and possibly the gayest haircut I have ever seen. Seriously looked like the economic recession had gotten the better of his mummy and daddy and they just stuck his head in the tractor back on the farm and then poured some toilet bleach into it... really not pleasant! In his hands there was a multicoloured poster covered with shiny star stickers that said "Welcome Home Emer!" in big sprawly letters that looked like those of a three-year-old.

I strolled across the entrance hall and Edward held my hand tightly, Alice and Jasper weren't far behind us. As we came into clearer view of the small Irish man his face contorted and he seemed incredibly confused.

"Heyyyyyy Wesley." I said dully.

"Hai Eee-mur, who's thus?" He replied that freakishly confused look stayed on his face.

"This is my soon-to-be hubby, Edward, my best friend Alice and her hubby Jasper. You're gonna take us to the ferry right?"

"Yeah yeah Eee-mur come this way." Suddenly his expression changed from confusion to anger.

This was going to be a fun car journey!

**Alice POV  
**Wesley Almond! Emer had told us about him. She said that in the high school she had went to he had been her geography teacher. Although he had NO teaching degree and was the biggest bogger on the planet he was still aloud to teach. The department of Education should have known better. Apparently he had flirted with one to many horny 6th years and was kicked out of teaching. He had got a job at the local Taxi Company. When he heard Emer was coming home from an unnamed source he had insisted he be the one to drive her. He winked at me and I swivelled back in horror. Jasper put his arm around me and growled.  
'Heyyyy Wesley," Emer said dully.  
'Hai Eee-mur, who's thus?' Wezoms asked. Jasper whispered in my ear that the jealousy coming off him was like heat waves.  
"This is my soon-to-be hubby, Edward." She said. His ego must have been seriously deflated next to Jasper and Edward. "My best friend Alice and her hubby Jasper. You're going to take us to the ferry right?" Emer sounded suicidal. This probably wasn't the best trip down memory lane.

"Yeah yeah Eee-mur come this way." Suddenly his expression changed from confusion to anger. "HOW VURY DARE YOU!" he screamed.  
His gigantic nose flared with rage as he looked me. Over the last few weeks I had developed a huge Star Trek obsession. I had seen the movie on a whim and had then gone to see it another three times that week with different members of the family. Nobody got it but it was my favourite movie of all time with my new celebrity crush Chris Pine. While Wezzoms had been talking I had taken out my Captain Kerk action figure and was making it walk over Jaspers shoulder. Obviously Wez didn't like to be ignored.  
"HOW VURY DARE YOU ignore ME!" He yelled, his veins popping. I yawned and raised my eyes to heaven.  
"DON"T IGNORE ME BIG HEAD!"  
Oww, now I was pissed. I glared at him. "Don't call me that again or you'll see what happens!" I replied with venom.  
He stuck his tongue out like a 3-year-old. "BI...."  
Before his could finish the insult I had pushed him out onto the road. He got up and shook off his torn jeans. He looked around confused.  
Just then a lorry came, Wez tried to run away but BAM, SKID, HORN, CRASH, DIE.!.!  
Wezzoms was Deadoms!

Emer POV

"We don't still have to tip him do we?" I asked sarcastically.

"I'm sorry." Alice said shyly. "I didn't mean to kill him. But look on the bright side... we saved a fortune on car rental!"  
"Big Whoop!" Edward said.

"Well nobody liked the poor bogger anyway..." Jasper added. "Judging from those freaky vibes he seemed to emit like CFC's."

"Soooooo anyway, terrible accident. Where do we get the ferry from?" I asked.

"We don't! To Dun Laoghire!" Alice squealed.

It only took us about and hour to get to Dun Laoghire after we stopped in teddy's for the most amazing 99's on the face of the earth. Carl Isle was a big island off Dalkey.

"WOWZA! D4 MUCH, ROYSH!" I said and turned around to see Edwards beautiful pouty face glaring back at me.

"We like it." Jasper said silently.

When we got to the forty-foot we were met by about twenty-five pairs old, pervy eyes waiting for us to strip. Edward and Jasper immediately stood in front of us and glared at the fat Irish guys.

"Why are they like that?" Alice whispered into my ear.

"Insulation" I said calmly but loud enough so everyone there could hear.

When the old guys realised there was one of them amongst the "Yankee's" there was a mutter around the crowd and the words "Model Agent, RTE2 and Erin O'Conner" were what I could make out of the commotion.

When we were changed and the guys went to get their swimming apparel on we were approached by a gang of about six men. Don't worry about me, I practically grew up here. I thought to myself trying to reassure Edward knowing he would be listening in.

"Um hi, I'm Brian and we're all from Guinness swimming club." One of the men said and then he began to stutter when we smiled at him. "Is there any chance I could get your autograph for my wife, she's a fan of yours."

"Grand love, what's her name."

"Um Bree-anne, spelt B R I A N."

"Grand there you go! Tell your wife thank you! Its great to have such nice supporters."

Suddenly a crowd had gathered.  
"Its like your the shiny new toy!" Alice whispered to me quickly.

"Sorry guys we have to steal them now" Edward interrupted "We have somewhere we need to be."

Oh thank God, my dashing knight has come to rescue me yet again! I thought to myself and giggled.

"Come fair maiden, your noble motorised steed is waiting for us!" He smiled as we strolled toward the jet skis.

When we reached the shore I saw a huge house, possibly the most amazing I had ever seen. As we strolled up the lawn a glanced around to see Alice and Jasper running the other direction.

"Where are you going?!" I shouted after them.

"Our place." Alice replied "We shall se you later!"

**Alice POV  
**Carl Isle was beautiful at night. I looked upon the big White House with anticipation at the wedding to come. The white marble looked like chalk on a blackboard against the sky. This house that I had only ever seen from the outside. It was Esme and Carlisle's house and we weren't allowed inside, but Edwards's marriage was a special circumstance I guess. I grabbed Jasper and ran in the opposite direction to our smaller but more homely guesthouse. Jasper was hyper as we swerved down the stone path and around trees. He loved our house.

It was my dream house, we all had our own houses and I had built ours in very specific specifications. It was a small, sweet German gingerbread house. The windows were glossy and pink flowers hung from every windowsill. The only light visible was from the doorway, which was open, waiting for us to enter. Jasper giggles and I looked at him questioningly.  
"You look like you're going to cry." He whispered through his smile.  
I shoved his arm and then ran to the house as if I had been reunited with my lover. Jasper followed on my heels.

What a night! Me and Jasper had stayed up......playing scrabble. Jasper was in the shower and I was just about to go get breakfast when there was a knock on the door. I ran to it excited. It was a happy looking Emer and Edward.  
"We're going to explore the Island. You guys comin'?" She said.  
"I'll go ask Jasper. Hold on a second."  
I walked off to the bathroom to ask him. Emer and Edward went into the room to chat. I came back looking dumbfounded, holding a note in my hand. Emer noticed and pulled the note out from between my fingers.  
She started at me with shock.  
"What is it?" Edward asked, still in the dark.  
"Jasper wasn't in the shower. He left a note for me. It said that he wants to play hide and seek and we have to find him." I explained.  
Suddenly the shock cleared and I cracked a wide smile.  
"Well lets find him then! Who ever finds him first gets a prize!"  
We all stood there for a while, eyeing each other up. We all ran for the door, wanting to be the winner.  
GAME ON!

**Emer POV**

Sure Edward could find Jaspers thoughts and Alice could see the future but I think I had the biggest advantage. SHABANG! And I was gone to another place. That was all it took, exactly why I always won baseball games. I dashed out the door giggling and I was just about to vanish when BANG.

There was me, on the floor, yet again! OUCH who did that? ALICE! She knows I'd win! That cheating bitch, why in the name of God would she hit me though. I was rolling around on the floor in pain when...

BAM BLACKOUT!

"Woo La La Happy Days! Bunny Rabbits! Ohhhhh Barbie Dress! I am excited! I wish Mo Mo and Aly were here! I always wanted them as my maids of honour! They really are the cooliest friends any girl could have! Where is my Emmy Wemmy! Has the wedding started yet? Oh La La!"

It was Courtney, she was sitting in a random room I'd never seen before... I think she was dreaming because she was consulting a Jiggly Puff, but why could I see it?! Wow, please don't tell me she's getting married! Ugh leave it to Biker Barbie to steal my thunder! If this wasn't a dream I was crashing that wedding! Was Alice rubbing off on me?

BAM BACK TO REALITY!

I opened my eyes and Alice was standing over me with gleaming eyes.

"I've never been so proud of you Bugsy!" She said like a designer mumsy after her baby won a beauty pageant.

"Wait, what's going on? Why did you assault me?!"

"Sorry about that! Eddie wasn't too happy either!"

"Wait where is he?!"

"Doesn't matter! Don't you wanna know what I'm doing?!"

"Knock yourself out Peaches."

"Look up! I haven't been this excited since Jasper did the Full Monty and he...."  
"Wait darling DON'T GO ALL BELLA ON ME!"

"Oh yes! Look up!"

"Oh My Edward...."

"And I thought Courtney was obsessed!"  
"Shut up! What's going on? Why am I in the pretty beach dress?"

"Its your wedding silly!"  
I got up looking seriously scared, I was so incredibly confused right now. I glanced into the mirror and I don't know who was staring back at me.... but it certainly wasn't me! No way I'm that pretty! How did she do it?!

Alice POV

The diversion had worked perfectly. I really thought it was my best acting ever. The night we had arrived me and Jasper had spend the whole night decorating a secluded part of the beach for their wedding. The tricky part now was getting Emer in the dress without her knowing. I showed her the fake note from Jasper and when she was distracted I karate chopped her in the neck. I had learned it from a monk in Tibet. It would knock someone unconscious for exactly two hours but it had side effects. Edward looked at me in horror as Emer crumpled to the floor.

"I just saw Emer have a vision!"

"Gift exchange is a side effect of the karate. Watch."

I grabbed his hand and  
POOF! We were at the beach. Edward looked stunned and a bit shaken. He looked around at the beach and at the beautiful candles creating an isle up to the arch of flowers. They would be lit at the start of the wedding at sunset. He looked like he would have cried. When his back was turned I karate chopped his neck and he slumped forward in the sand. Neither of them could be trusted in dressing themselves properly.

It had taken a while and a lot of elbow grease but I had done it. Edward was dressed in a light blue linen suit, without shoes. It was too sandy for shoes. He was propped up next to the arch of flowers because he would soon be waking up. Jasper was waiting with him so I could go retrieve Emer. POOF! I was back at the house.  
Emer lay on the bed sleeping soundly. The dress she wore was different to the one she brought. It was knee length and was made with a light, shiny silk which shone wherever the light touched. I had done her hair in gentle waves and clipped some pink flowers into it. She was barefoot like Edward but I had left her eyeliner on to keep her happy. I walked over to her sleeping form and shook her shoulder to wake her up.  
She blinked groggily and made the usual school morning sounds.  
"UGHHHH......5 more minutes.......ieck! The light burns." She rolled over. I put my hands on my hips and pouted.  
"Emer you need to get up. It's your wedding." I shouted.  
Emer rolled over and looked at me confused. I picked her up by the shoulders and led her to the mirror.  
"OWW MY Edward!" She stuttered. I smiled at her proudly.  
She turned around to look at me, the gratitude evident in her puppy eyes.  
I held out my hand and smiled.  
"To the Wedding we go."  
She took it and we zoomed off to Edward and the beach.

**Emer Pov**

POOF! Alice and myself were at the entrance to the forest and I'm going to be completely honest, I couldn't breathe never mind think! I really wished my mum could be here to see this, she really would be proud that I had found myself such an amazing guy to be with forever. Alice was beaming at me, she looked absolutely sensational but for once I was the bell of the ball, the centre of attention and in a creepy way I was enjoying it.

I thought about the girl's back in forks and how much I missed them. I couldn't have asked for a better group of people to be around, honestly. I could feel myself starting to get weepy when Alice so rudely interrupted.  
"Whaoh Nelly, I left that eyeliner on you because you're my friend, but if that runs down your face I will personally kill you with my bare hands!"  
"You're killing my buzzzzz." I replied quickly, putting emphasis on the word buzz.  
"Well I really don't care Juliet, I'm maid of honour! My job is to get you down the aisle in one piece, now go!" She began to nudge me and I decided to get going before she started to hurt me.

As I strolled towards the beach I could hear the introduction to "There You'll Be" my favourite song ever being played on the piano. The waves were crashing gently onto the beach and the silhouette of the whole scene was so beautiful against the backdrop of the sun setting into the Irish sea and the orange hue that seemed to gleam like fairy lights of each of the flowers. Alice held my hand as we walked down the aisle and smiled, and she seemed to dance down the aisle beside me. I knew I should have let Jasper give me away, at least then I'd be glowing. Edward laughed to himself and turned around to smile at me.

I reached the arch by the time it got to the chorus and held Edwards hand. We both glanced back at Alice and Jasper wondering which one of them was going to marrying but they both just grinned and shook their heads. I could feel myself trembling, my nerves were getting the better of me! They always did!

I glanced back around at the same time as Edward and a sudden wave of relief washed over me as I saw Carlisle smiling back at me.  
"Shall we begin?" He asked in his beautiful polite tone of voice.  
Edward and myself smiled at each other and then at Carlisle.

The ceremony went far too quickly, we had written our own vows (I had always wanted to do that and it truly is so much easier to write when it is about someone you love.) And finally it came to the rings. My hand was shaking like a leaf as Edward lifted it up and placed a ring on my slender finger. I did the same with him fumbling like an idiot and nearly dropping the ring more than once.  
"You may kiss the bride." The words I had been waiting to hear for the last seventy-three years and I must say it was without a doubt worth the wait.

Time seemed to stop until I was eventually brought back into reality by the cheers of Alice and Jasper. Edward and I turned around holding hands and smiled back at the two who were incredibly paired with each other. They really were meant to be together. The sun was just sinking behind the small chop of the sea as we walked back down the aisle. Followed by Alice, Jasper, Carlisle and Esme. I think Alice was throwing rice… but it could have been pebbles, I wasn't sure. I was lost in my own world.

We all sat around the sitting room in the big white house eating cake and chatting, never once did left Edwards side. It mustn't have been that long before the musical instruments were brought out. Edward sat by the piano, playing tear-jerking classics like "Dance with My father" by Luther Vandross and "Your Beautiful" by James Blunt. I got out my guitar and dedicated "Stray Dog" by Robert Pattinson to Edward and then I played "Closest Thing to Crazy" by Katie Melua. The day was drawing to a close and what a day it had been.


End file.
